in The Magnetic Lady, or Humors Reconciled — Jonson, Ben
Metadata
Play
The Magnetic Lady, or Humors Reconciled
Author
Jonson, Ben
Year (catalogued)
1640
First performance
1632
Decade
1640s
Genre
Comedy
Play type
Adult Professional
Company
King's Men
Speech prefix(es)
Cla. | Clay.
Words
367
Characters
1780
Typicality
0.41 (cosine to cluster centroid)
TCP id
A72473.23
BritDrama no.
2385
Cluster
Cluster 21 — Old fathers & plain counsel
Important excerpts
Passages from this character's speech that contain the most distinguishing words for Cluster 21 (gar, shillings, alii, yongrave, ogenes, nat…). Matches are highlighted.
concord, where I dwell, All Kilburne be my witness; If I were not Begotten in bashfulness, brought up in shamefacedness: Let one bring a dog, but to my vace, that can Zay, I have Beatrice 'hun, and without a vault; Or but a cat, will swear upon a book, I have as much as zet a vier her tail; And I'll give him, or her a crown for mends.
without a vault; Or but a cat, will swear upon a book, I have as much as zet a vier her tail; And I'll give him, or her a crown for mends. But to give out, and zay, I have robbed a Captain! Receive me at the latter day, if I Ere thought of any such matter; or could mind it—. O Lord! o me! what shall I do? poor John! Alas,
Full speech
No wusse. I lighted, I, but now in the yard: Puppy have scarce unswaddled my legs yet. I did it to save charges: we must dance, Oh this day, zure: and who can dance in boots? No, I God on my best straw-coloured stockings, And swaddeld them over to zave charges; I. Murder, Oh Murder! No Bun; but had not I cried Murder, I wusse— No, as I am a kyrsin soul, would I were hanged If ever I—alas I! would I were out Of my life, so I would I were, and in again— Father, will you believe me? Would I might never stir in my new shoes, If ever I would do so voule a fact. No; Truth is my rightful Judge: I have kept my hands, here hence, from evil speaking, Lying, and slandering; and my tongue from stealing. He do not live this day can say, John Clay I have zeene thee, but in the way of honesty. I take the town to concord, where I dwell, All Kilburne be my witness; If I were not Begotten in bashfulness, brought up in shamefacedness: Let one bring a dog, but to my vace, that can Zay, I have Beatrice 'hun, and without a vault; Or but a cat, will swear upon a book, I have as much as zet a vier her tail; And I'll give him, or her a crown for mends. But to give out, and zay, I have robbed a Captain! Receive me at the latter day, if I Ere thought of any such matter; or could mind it—. O Lord! o me! what shall I do? poor John! Alas, That ever I was born! I will not stay by't, For all the Tiles in Kilburne. Nay, then all's well, hearing your news Ball Pupy, You have brought from Paddington, I ene stole home here, And thought to hide me, in the Bairn ere since. No faith, I never was further then the Bairn. I have lost my wits, My little wits, good Mother; I am distracted. No's my record: I never zaw you avore. Is the Huy and Cry passed by? And am I out of danger to be hanged?
Plot summary
Plot — The Magnetic Lady, or Humors Reconciled
Probee and Damn-Play are sent on stage by the audience to bargain for a good play; what they get is The Magnetic Lady. They watch the play and comment on it between the acts. Visitors flock to Lady Loadstone’s house, some brought by her lodger, Compass, others to pay court to her sickly but wealthy niece, Placentia Steel, on her birthday. By the terms of her parents’ will, Placentia’s marriage portion of £16,000 is to be paid when she marries, but until then is held by her uncle, Interest. There are several suitors, including Practice the lawyer and Silkworm the courtier. Lady Loadstone initially prefers Practice, but the prospect of being made a countess through a friend at court converts her to Silkworm’s suit. Palate also promotes Silkworm, pointing out that Practice is already engaged to the servant Pleasance. Interest is trying to arrange a marriage between Placentia and Bias, who is a younger brother and will be content to accept less than the full dowry. Ironside, Compass’s brother, wounds Silkworm in a violent altercation at dinner, and Compass persuades the courtier to seek redress in a duel rather than at law; Bias hopes that Silkworm will be killed and the court rid of a nuisance, but in the event he merely talks to Ironside about valour. Placentia turns out to be pregnant, and the suitors back off; Practice asks Compass to help him marry Pleasance instead. Compass learns that Pleasance and Placentia were swapped for one another in their cradles, and uses the blank licence obtained by Practice to get himself married to ‘Pleasance’. His bride then disappears, and turns out to have been abducted by Polish, her supposed mother, who is trying to conceal the baby swap. The steward Needle pretends to suffer from walking and talking in his sleep, and persuades Interest that a ghost, in love with him, has hidden treasure in the garden. Interest goes looking for it and falls into a well. The false Placentia gives birth. Convinced that the pregnancy was only malicious gossip, Bias agrees to marry her, and Interest promises to pay him the dowry. Compass makes his peace with Practice with the gift of a court office and has Interest arrested. Polish confesses the exchange of infants, which leaves Interest obliged to pay the money twice over, to Compass in respect of the true Placentia and to Bias in respect of the false one. Fortunately for him, Polish also admits that the pregnancy was genuine, so Bias backs out of the marriage. Lady Loadstone and Ironside…