Early Modern Drama · Character Archetypes

CELESTINE

in Satiromastix, or The Untrussing of the Humorous Poet — Dekker, Thomas

Metadata

PlaySatiromastix, or The Untrussing of the Humorous Poet
AuthorDekker, Thomas
Year (catalogued)1602
First performance1601
Decade1600s
GenreComedy
Play typeAdult Professional; Boys Professional
CompanyLord Chamberlain's (Hunsdon's) Men and Children of Paul's (second)
Speech prefix(es)Cae • . | Cael. | Cal. | Cae. | C •• ▪
Words559
Characters2887
Typicality0.37 (cosine to cluster centroid)
TCP idA20081
BritDrama no.1304
ClusterCluster 4 — Constant hearts & virtuous ladies

Important excerpts

Passages from this character's speech that contain the most distinguishing words for Cluster 4 (loyalty, handmaid, spotless, blessings, hamilcar, moves…). Matches are highlighted.

self art poisoned, take me hence, For Innocence, shall murder Innocence. 'Tis done already, the Spiritual Court, Is breaking up; all Offices discharged, My soul removes from this weak standing house, Of frail mortality: Dear Father, bless Me now and ever: Dearer Man farewell, I jointly take my leave of thee and life, Go, tell the

Full speech

Then pleasure is a thief, a fit, a fever: God keep thy honour safe, my blood from harm. A constant wife. Virgins never change their life, She that is wived a maid, is Maid and wife. Thrice happy then. 'Tis overtaken. Women are overtaken when they meet; It were good, If every Maiden blush, had such a blood. I thank the good Sir Vaughan, I will come. Then, o my father must I go? Oh my husband Shall I then go? Oh my self, will I go? I will, but give me leave, To say I may not, nor I ought not, say not Still, I must go, let me entreat I may not. Then keep that word To swear by, Oh let me be constant still. If breaking constancy thou breakest them both. I may be constant still, and yet not true. Must I then go 'tis easy to say no, Must is the King hims life, and I must go; Shall I then go? that word is thine; I shall, Is thy command: I go because I shall; Will I then go? I ask my self; o ill, King, says I must; you, I shall; I, I will. Why didst thou swear? And oath? why, what's and oath? 'tis but the smoke, Of flame & blood; the blister of the spirit, Which rizeth from the Steam of rage, the bubble That shoots up to the tongue, and scalds the voice, ( or oaths are burning words) thou worst but one, 'Tis frozen long ago: if one be numbered, What Countrymen are they? where do they dwell That speak nought else but oaths? Nor I to answer him. I, I am death's echo. Welcome, o poison physic against lust, Thou wholesome medicine to a constant blood; Thou rare Apothe carry that canst keep, My chastity preserved, within this box; Of tempting dust, this painted earthen pot, That stands upon the all of the white soul, To set the shop out Like a flatterer, To draw the customers of Sin: come, come, Thou art no poison, but a diet-drink, To moderate my blood: White-innocent Wine, Art thou made guilty of my death? o no, For thou thy self art poisoned, take me hence, For Innocence, shall murder Innocence. 'Tis done already, the Spiritual Court, Is breaking up; all Offices discharged, My soul removes from this weak standing house, Of frail mortality: Dear Father, bless Me now and ever: Dearer Man farewell, I jointly take my leave of thee and life, Go, tell the King thou hast a constant wife. Not to be thy wife, But first I plead my duty, and salute The world again. Better lead Apes then men. Men, were Maids cowards, they not come so never, My Lord the Measure's done, I pleale my duty. As thus, by violence detained, They may be constant still, that are constrained. Let lose thy oath so shall we still be even. Must I betray my Chastit ? So long Clean from the treason of rebelling lust; Oh husband! Oh my ather! if poor , Must not live chased, then let me cham lie die. We shall have sport to see them; come bright beauty's, The Sun stoops low, and whispers in our ears, To hasten on our Mask, let's crown this night, With choice composed wreathes of sweet delight.

Plot summary

Plot — Satiromastix, or The Untrussing of the Humorous Poet
Celestine and Sir Walter Terrill are married. At the wedding dinner, the King becomes enamoured of Celestine and induces the bridegroom to swear to give up his first night of sex with her: he must deliver her to court that evening, still a virgin. Her father, Sir Quintilian, devises a scheme to save both her honour and Sir Walter’s: he gives her a cup of poison, and she drinks it. She keeps her marriage vows, and Sir Walter delivers her body to the King as part of a masque. The King is abashed to discover that she is a chaste, faithful wife. Then she wakes up: it was only a sleeping draught, and Sir Quintilian has proved both the bride’s constancy and the bridegroom’s love. In the sub-plot, Sir Quintilian and two other knights all become interested in marrying the widow Mistress Miniver, and each independently bribes Tucca to advance his suit. Miniver seems most interested in the bald Sir Adam, so Sir Vaughan engages Horace to write a satire against baldness. He invites the ladies, including Miniver, to a banquet of plums, and there Horace recites his poem on the glories of hair. The poem has the desired effect on Miniver; but Sir Adam hires Horace’s rival, Crispinus, to write a defence of baldness. It all comes to naught, however, for Tucca ends up marrying Miniver himself. In the third plot, Horace’s bitter epigrams against Tucca get into circulation among the gallants. Tucca swears vengeance, and stabs Horace, but with an edgeless sword; Horace’s response is shown to derive from fear rather than physical pain. Horace is accused of giving up a useful trade, bricklaying, and of unlawfully arraigning his rivals on the stage. He is brought to court dressed as a satyr, and the King appoints Crispinus to judge him. Crowned with a nettle wreath, Horace is exposed as an impostor (the real Horace was a better poet), and is made to forswear his inclination to arrogance and personal satire.