SIR LIONEL

Oh Frank I have the worship now in the right kind, the sword of Knighthood sticks still upon my shoulders, and I feel the blow in my purse, it has cut two leather bags asunder; but all's one, honour must be purchased: I will give over my City coat, and betake my self to the Court jacket; as for trade, I will deal in't no longer, I will seat thee in my shop, and it shall be thy care to ask men what they lack, my stock shall be summed up, and I will call thee to and account for it. That's all one, I do love to do things beyond men's Hope's, To morrow I remove into the Strand, There for this quarter dwell, the next at Fulham: He that hath choice, may shift, the while shalt thou Be master of this house, and rend it free. To day I'll go dine with my Lord Mayor: to mor row with the Sheriffs, and next day with the Aldermen, I will spread the Ensign of my knighthood over the face of the Cit ty, which shall strike as great a terror to my enemies, as ever Tamberlain to the Turks. Come Frank, come in with me, and see the meat, Upon the which my knighthood first shall eat. Ex: omnes. How now! what are you two consulting on, on husbands? you think you lose time I am sure, but hold your own a little Girls, it shall not be long ere I'll provide for you: and for you Gartered, I have bethought my self alrea die, Whirlpit the usurer is late deceased, A man of unknown wealth, which he has left Unto a provident kinsman as I hear, That was once servant to that unthrift Stains. A prudent Gentleman they say he is, And (as I take it) called master Bubble. Why though he be gone, what then? it's not you that can fetch him again, with all your cunning, it must be your comfort, that he died well. Gods precious, we are too tardy, let one be sent presently to meet the gerles, and hasten their coming home quickly: how dost thou stand dreaming? Gentlemen, I see you love me, you are careful of your hour; you may be de ceiued in your cheer, but not in your welcome. Here come the Gipsies, the Sunburned gerles, Whose beauty's will not utter them alone, They must have bags although my credit crack for't. Yes marry is she sir. Why how now! why come you from Church to kneel thus publicly, what's the matter? Yes nimble-chaps, what say you to that? Here's the right trick of them all, let a man Be motioned to um, they could be content To lead a single life forsooth, when the harlotries Do pine and run into diseases, Eat chalk and oatmeal, cry and creep in corners, Which are manifest tokens of their longings, And yet they will dissemble. But Gartered, As you do owe me reverence, and will pay it, Prepare your self to Like this Gentleman, Who can maintain thee in thy choice of Gowns, Of tires, of servants, and of costly Jewels; Nay for a need, out of his easy nature, Mayest draw him to the keeping of a Coach For Country; and Carroach for London, Indeed what mightest thou not. Thank the Messenger, and make him drink, Tell him I will not fail to wait the coarse, Yet stay, I will go talk with him my self: Gartered, think upon what I have told you, And let me er't be long receive your answer. Well Master Bubble, we'll go in and taste of your bounty. In the mean time, you must be of good cheer. Lord, lord, what a careless world is this, neither Bride nor Bridegroom ready, time to go to Church, and not a man unroosted, this age has not seen a young Gallant rise with a candle, we live drowned in featherbeds, and dream of no other felicity: this was not the life when I was a young man, what makes us so weak as we are now? a featherbed: what so unapt for exercise? a featherbed: what breed such pains and aches in our bones? why a featherbed or a wench, or at least a wench in a featherbed: is it not a shame, that and old man as I am should be up first, and in a wedding day, I think in my conscience there's more mettle in lads of three score, then in boys of one and twenty. Enter Basket hilt. Why Basket hilt. Well, God rest his soul, he's gone, and we must all follow him Come, come, follow me knave, follow me, I have the best nose 'ith house, I think, either we shall have rainy uvea there, or the vaults unstopped: sirrah, go see, I would not have my guess smell out any such inconvenience: Do you hear sirrah Simon? Bid the Kitchenmaid skowre the sink, and make clean her backside, for the wind lies joust vpon't. And bid Anthony put on his white fustian doublet, for he must wait to day: It does me so much good to stir and talk, to place this, and displace that, that I shall need no Apothecaries prescriptions, I have sent my daughter this mor ning as far as Pimliko to fetch a draught of Darby ale, that it may fetch a colour in her cheeks, the puling harlotry looks so pale, and it is all for want of a man, for so their mother would say, God rest her soul, before she died. Exit Servant. How knave, the Gentlemen! They are at your service sir, and forth coming. Shall I not be trussed to day? Is Will Rash up yet? Knock sirrah at his chamber, Knock within. The house might be plucked down and built again Before hee'd uva e with the noise. Rash aloft. Rather thou art drunk, thou lazy slowch, That makest thy bed thy graven, and in it buriest All thy youth and vigor; up for shame. Fie, fie, not ready yet? what sluggishness Hath seized upon you? why thine eyes are close still. Lord how you stand! I am ashamed to see The Sun should be a witness of your sloth, Now sir, your haste. Oh Gentlemen, you love, you honour me, welcome, welcome good Master Geraldine, you have taken pains To accompany and undeserving friend. Enter Philli . How now wench, are the females ready yet? The time comes on upon us, and we run backward: We are so untoward in our business, We think not what we have to do, nor what we do. I'st possible, what think you Gentlemen? Are not these wenches forward? is there not virtue in a man can make young Virgins leave their beds so soon. But is the widow gone along with them? How, my blessing! Master Geraldine, is not that your son? I suspect knavery, what are you? Why do you kneel hand in hand with her? Hoy day! it's palpable, I am gulled, and my son Scattergood and Bubble fooled, you are married? More villainy! every thing goes the wrong way. Yes marry shall you, you shall eene to the Counter again, and that's the right way for you. I do fear that I shall turn stinckard, I do smell such a matter: you are married then? I believe the knave has drunk Ipocras, He is so pleasant. Do you hear me, will you two go sleep again? take out the tother nap, for you are both made Cockescombes, and so am I. Yea Cocks-combes. You two come now to go to church to be married, And they two come from Church, and are married. Do you know that youth in Satin, he's the penner that belongs to that Inkhorn. Sirrah let him go, I'll be his bail, for all debts which come ag inst him. Have you your mortgage in? Stand up, the matter is well amended, Master Geraldine, you give sufferance to this match. Why you say well, my blessing fallen upon you, By my roth since thou hast ane the young kna e, God give the oy of him, and may e prove A wiser man then his Master. I bail him knave! wherefore should I bail him? No, carry him away, I'll relieve no prodigals. But now M. Scattergood, what say you to this? Why that's well said, Then I perceive we shall wind up all wrong: Come Gentlemen, and all our other guests: Let our well-tempered bloods taste B cchus feasts, But let us know fi st how these sports delight, And to these Gentlemen each bid good night. Bid him come, knave. Is he of your acquaintance, sir? It was a sign of virtue in you sir; but heel be here at dinner. Master Balance, what makes you so strange? Come, you're welcome: what's the News? Speak softly Master Balance. But is there no hope of his recovery? Well, I do suffer for him, and am loath Indeed to do, what I am constrained to do: Well sir, I mean to cease on what is left. And hark you one woe worser more. Go to, no more of this at this time. What sir, are you come? Master Geraldines son of Essex ? I shall be glad to see him when he coms. In the mean time you're welcome; pray be not strange, I'll leave my Son amongst you Gentlemen, I have some business: hark you M. Balance, Dinner will soon be ready; one word more. Exit Lyo. & Bal. Now Widow, you are welcome to my house, And to your own house too; so you may call it: For what is mine, is yours: you may command here, As at home, and be as soon obeyed. My son Bubble, I take it? How now son Bubble, how come you thus attyrder What, do you mean to make your self a laughing stock, would? Why but what lig is this? I but son Bubble, where did you two buy your Felts? Nay, I think you had it upon trust: for no man that has any shame in him, would take money for it: behold Sir. Nay never do you laugh, for you're i'th same block. What was he that cheated you? Do you know him again, if you see him? Come, take no Can for Cloaks, I'll furnish you; To night you lodge with me, to morrow morn Before the Sun be up, prepare for Church, The Widow and I have so concluded on't: The Wenches understand not yet so much, Nor shall not, until bedtime: then will they, Not sleep a wink all night, for very joy. Oh Master Geraldine, I saw you not before: Your Father now is come to town, I hear? Were not my business earnest, I would see him But pray entreat him break and hours sleep To morrow morn, accompany me to Church; And come your self I pray along with him. But look, here comes one, That has but lately shook off his Shackles. How now firra, wherefore come you? Oh you do graciously, 'tis good advice: Let it take root firra, let it take root. But come Widow come, and see your Chamber; Nay your company too, for I must speak with you. Exit. Here's ill lodging Widow : but you must know, If we had better, we could afford it you. Not better, Widow, nor yet welcomer: But we will leave you to it; and the rest. Phillis, pray let your Mistress want not any thing, Once more Good night, I'll leave a kiss with you, As earnest of a better Gift to morrow. Sirrah, a Light. Come, come away, each Bird unto his nest, To morrow night's a time of little rest. Exit. Out sluggish knave it's nearer unto five, The whole house has out-slept themselves, as if they had drunk wild poppy: Sirrah, go you and raise the maids, and let them call upon their Mistress's. I thought as much, for she knows what belong's to't, Come Gentlemen, me thinks it's sport to see Young wenches run to church before their husbands: En. Rash. Faith we shall make them blush for this re night: A sirrah, are you come? why that's well said; I marled indeed that all things were so quiet, Which made me think th'ad not unwrapped their sheet : And then were they at Church I hold my life: Maids think it long until each be made a with e. Hast thou my cloak knave? well said, put it on, We'll after them; let me go hasten both, Both the Bridegrooms forward, we'll walk a little Softly on afore: but see, see, if they be not come To fetch us now, we come. we come, Bid them return, and save themselves this labour. Ye're welcome sir, when will your Father be in town? Why this is excellent, men whom it not concerns Are more respective then we that are main Actors.