BUBBLE

Affection sir will burst out. I will tell him he is and usuring rascal, and one that would do the Commonwealth good, if he were hanged. But Master, wherefore should we be parted? Why but whither do you mean to go Master? To sea! Lord bless us, me thinks I hear of a tempest already, but what will you do at Sea? Oh Master! have the grace of Wapping before your eyes, remember a high tide, give not your friends cause to wet their handkerchiefs: nay Master, I'll tell you a better course then so, you and I will go and rob mine uncle; if we escape, we'll dominiere together, if we be taken, we'll be hanged together at Tyburn, that's the warmer gallows of the two. Do you hear, my friend, do you know M. Bubble if you do see him? What is your business with Master Bubble? Tell it, my friend, I am the man. I tell thee, honest friend, my name is master Bubble, Master Bartholomew Bubble. Pray thee honest friend, go to the next Haberdash ers, and bid him send me a new melancholy hat, and take thou that for thy labour. Umh, umh, umh. Do you hear, my friend, for what do you knock there? The worshipful! and what would you do with the worshipful Master Bubble? I am the man. Thy news is good, and I have looked for't long, Thanks unto thee, my friend, and goodman Thong. What are you? He is and honest man it seems, for he has both his ears. The putting out of mine! would you have the putting out of money? No sir, I am old enough to put out my own money. Do you hear, my friend, can you tell me when, and how my uncle died? How! by a Butcher? I will not stand with you for such a matter, because you have been my master, but otherwise, I will entertain no man without some Knights or Ladies Letter for their behaviour, Geruase I take it is your Christian name. Well Geruase, be a good servant, and you shall find me a dutiful master: and because you have been a Gentle man, I will entertain you for my Tutor in behaviour; Con dust me to my palace. Exeunt omnes. I, I, he's gone sir Lionel, he's gone. Truly and so it is, I would to God I had eene another uncle that would die no worse; surely I shall weep again, if I should find my handkerchief. I, I, sir Lyonell, they are my onions, I thought to have had them roasted this morning for my cold: Geruase you have not wept to day, pray take your onions Gentlemen, the re membrance of death is sharp, therefore there is a banquet within to sweeten your conceits: I pray walk in Gentlemen, walk you in, you know I must needs be melancholy, and keep my Chamber, Geruase, usher them into the banquet. If grief take not away my stomach, I will have good cheer I warrant you Sprinkle. Had the women puddings to their dole? And how did they take them? Oh thou Hercules of ignorance! I mean, how were they sati fied? Oh insatiable women! whom two puddings would not sati fie, but vanish Sp inckl ; bid your fellow Geruase come hither: Exit Sprinkle. And off my mourning robes, grief to the graven, For I have gold, and therefore will be brave: In silks I'll rattle it of every colour, And when I go by water, scorn a Sculler, In black carnation velvet I will cloak me, Enter Stai es. And when men bid God save me, Cry Tu quoque: It is needful a Gentleman should speak Latin sometime, is it not Geruase? Why then will I make use of that little I have, Upon times and occasions, here Geruase, take this bag, And run presently to the Mercers, buy me seven ell, of horse flesh coloured taffeta, nine yards of yellow satin, and eight yards of orange tawny velvet; then run to the Tailors, the Haberdashers, the Sempsters, the Cutlers, the Persumers, and to all trades whatsoever that belong to the m king up of a Gen tleman; and amongst the rest, let not the Barber be forgotten ten: and look that he be and excellent fellow, and one that can snack his fingers with dexterity. Do so good Geruase, it is time my beard were cor rected, for it is grown so Saucy, as it begins to play with my nose. Is it in fashion? why then my nose shall endure it, let it tickle his worst. Geruase, give me thy hand, I think thou hast more wit then I that am thy Master, and for this Speech only, I do here create thee my steward: I do long me thinks to be at and Ordinary, to smile at Fortune, and to be bountiful: Geruase a bout your business good Geruase, while to I go and meditate upon a Gentlemanlike behaviour, I have and excellent gate already Geruase, have I not? But dispatch Geruase, the satin and the velvet must be thought upon, and the Tu quoque must not be forgotten: for whensoever I give Arms, that shall be my Motto. Exit Bub. Tu quoque sir. Tu quoque. Et tu quoque. Et tu quoque. Master Bubble is my name, sir. Et tu quoque. And I with you. With all my heart sir. Shall I desire your name sir? Of the Scattergood's of London? Good Master Scattergood. No indeed sir. I will go sir over the whole world for your sake, But in cur esie I will not budge a foot. Enter Ni ihammer. In good faith I am but a simple Gamester, and do not know what to do. My money! I do know how much my money is, but he shall not pay me, I have a better conscience then so: what for throwing the dice twice, i'faith he should have but a hard bar gain of it. Et tu quoque? And nine that. One and five that. Come Master Spendall, set. That's no matter, what I have lost, I have lost; nor can I choose but smile at the foolishness of the dice. M. Scattergood, will you walk in? Thanks, and Tu quoque is a word for all. Gods will Geruase! how shall I behave my self to the Gentlewomen? Nay, and that be all, I care not, for I'll set a good face on't, that's flat: and for my nether parts, let them speak for themselves: here's a leg, and ever a Baker in England show me a better, I'll give him mine for nothing. What sweet Geruase? I would they would else. Let me alone to dispraise my self, I'll make my self the arrantest Coxcomb within a whole Country. Is this the eldest sir? I'll kiss the youngest first, because she likes me best. They kiss exceeding well, I do not think but they have been brought up too't, I will begin to her Like a Gen tleman in a set speech: Fair Lady, shall I speak a word with you? With you Lady,—this way,—a little more,— So now 'tis well, umh— Even as a Drummer,—or a Pewterer. In good faith sweet Lady you say true But pray mark me further, I will begin again. Even as a Drummer, as I said before,— Or as a Pewterer. Do—do—do. By my troth Lady, I do not know: for to say truth, I am a kind of and Ass. Yes indeed Lady. So God would me, I am Lady: you never saw and arranter Ass in your life. Y faith but he shall: How say you sir, Am not I and Ass? Pray look upon me Lady. I but look upon me well, and tell me if you ever saw any man look so scurvily, as I do? You do not mark me? I, but look upon me well: Did you ever see a worse timberd Leg? I but your four square Legs are none of the best. O! Jarvis, Jarvis. What say you now to me Lady, can you find ere a good inch about me? Find it, and take it sweet Lady: There I think I bobd her, Jarvis? Augh! now she comes to me: My behaviour? alas, alas, 'tis clownicall; and my discourse is very bald, bald: You shall not hear me break a good Jest in a twelve month. No, I want the Boon Ioure, and the Tu quoques, Which yonder Gentleman has: Ther's a bob for him too: There's a Gentleman, and you talk of a Gentleman? We are sworn Brother's in good faith Lady. 'Sfoot, if Mistress Joyce will, we'll be married to night. I care not; any whither, so the Clown have a partly: For Ifayth I am no body without a Fool. Green? Greene's and Ass. Indeed I would no reason: for they say, he is as Like me as ever he can look. Not before the Gentlewomen; not I never. Why then Custom is not so mannerly, as I would be. How Apparel makes a man respected; the very chil dren in the street do adore me: for if a Boy that is throwing at his lack-alent chance to hit me on the shins: Why I say nothing but, Tu quoque, smile, and forgive the Child with a beck of my hand, or some such Like token: so by that means, I do seldom go without broken shins. I do wonder what language he speaks. Do you hear my friend, are not you a Conjurer? Oh Lord Sir, are you the man; give me your hand: How do ye: in good faith I think I have herd of you. This fellow has his tongue at his fingers ends: But hark you sir, is your Italian the finest Gentleman? Why then he has his Tu quoque in his salute? I would my man Jarvis were here, for he under stands these things better then I. You will not serve? I pary sir, whats the lowest price of being Italianated ? I would you would do it Sir, if you will stand to my Bounty, I will pay you, as I am and Italian tu quoque. Yes sir. No sir, 'tis lose. Excellent well: I would you would set on my head so. Is it as you would have it! Nay I warrant you, let me alone; if I perceive a thing once, I'll carry it away: Now pray sir, reach my Cloak. No, what do your Italians wear no Cloaks? Sa'y so'prethee keep it then. See, yonder's the come pany that I look for; therefore if you will set my face of any fashion, pray do it quickly? I will persever, I warrant thee; only do thou stand aloof and be not seen, because I would have them think I fetched it out of my own practice. Save you Gent. I salute you after the Italian fashion. By my troth he's a rare fellow, he said true: They are all in and ecstasy. Um; Ignorance, ignorance. Would, would, would, would. Who has made him such a Coxcomb troe? And Italian tu quoque. Puh, the Italian fashion? the tatterd-de-malian fashion he means. Is this the Italian fashion? Et tu Queen que, are we both cozened: Then lets show our selves brother's in adversity, and embrace. Marry sir, he was a Knave that cheated me. Yes I know him again, if I see him: But I do not know how I should come to see him. Oh Jarvis, Jarvis, do you see us two, Jarvis? No, you do not see us very well; For we have been horribly abused: Never were Englishmen so gulled in Italian, as we have been. Jarvis you lie, I have lost my Cloak and Hat: And therefore you must use your credit for another. And I have to talk with you too, Mistress Joyce: Pray a word. Pray let me see your hand: the line of your Maiden head is out. Now for your Finger; upon which Finger will you wear your wedding Ring? Then I perceive you mean to wear it on your thumb. Well, the time is come sweet Joyce, the time is come. For me to tickle thy Tuquoque ; to do the act of our forefathers: therefore prepare, provide, To morrow morn to meet me as my Brde. Exit. Et tu quoque, forsooth. What sayest thou brother? heigh ho! As fast as a Kentish oyster, surely I was begotten in a Plumb-tree, I would such a deal of gum about mine eyes. Enter Servant. Father Rash, be not so outrageous, we will go in and buckle our selves, all in good time, how now! what's this a bout my shins? Enter old Geraldine, and Long-field. Pray what's that Splendour? Tu quoque to all: what, shall we go to Church? Come, I long to be about this gear. And against mine, a man might would digested a Wood cock better. How, married! I would see that man durst ma ry her. Why ir I would forbid the banes. How, let me see, are not you my man Her ase ? And have you married her? And do you think you have used me well? Oh intolerable rascal! I will presently be made a Ju stice of Peace, and have thee whipped, go fetch a Constable. Good sir Lyonell, I beseech you sir, Gentlemen, I pray make a purse for me. Why that does you no harm Her see, master I should say; some compassion. Tenterhook let e go, I will take his worships offer without wages, rather then come into your clum ches a gain; a man in a blue coat may have some colour for his knavery, n the Counter he can have none. To mirth and laughter henceforth I'll provoke you, If you but please to Like of Greens Tu quoque. How stark dead! & could not aquam vitae fetch him again? I shall love aquam vitae & rosa solis the better while I live. Would would, the dice are not to be blamed, a man may per ceiue this is no Gentlemanly gamester, by his chasing: do you hear, my friend, fill me a glass of beer, and ther's a shilling for your pains.