VANITY

What, father Croust, whither post you so fast? More shame for you, to keep your ass so lean: But whither go you now? And wherefore? Indeed it seems by thy beggars state, Thou hast needs of money, but let me hear, How or by whom thinkest thou to get this gear? That's somewhat, but how wilt thou come at her Whom? Who is that? What, in such haste forsooth, so suddenly, And so good cheap, without reward or fee? Go to then, i'll tell thee: his name is Vanity. No more ado, ask but for Vanity, Reward him well, he'll help thee to money. Do so. Now sure this Coystrell makes me smile, To see his greedy gaping thus for gain, First hardly God, then kept with harder pain, As you ever long by proof shall see full plain. What, Money, sing you so lustily? Money says reason, for so does it fare, Money makes masteries, old proverbs declare. But, Money, Of Fortune our sovereign dame, What news? Tistrue; now must I show my diligence. Down Ladies, stoup, do your reverence. 'Tis he in deed: what say you to him? For money man? what, still so hastily? Why so? who is it thou fearest? tell me. Prodigality, is it true? young, wasteful, roisting Prodigality, To encounter old, sparing, covetous niggard, Tenacity! Sure such a match as needs must yield us sport: Therefore until the time that Prodigality resort, I'll entertain this Croust, with some device. Well, father, to be sped of money with a trice, What will you give me? Indeed? Now, sir, in sooth you offer so bountifully, As needs you must be used accordingly. But tell me, know you him that comes here? Tush man, be of good cheer, I warrant thee, He speedeth best, that best rewardeth me. How now, my friends, what needs this variance? Money comes not by force, money comes by chance: And sith at one instant, you both seek for money, Appeal both to Fortune, and then shall you try, Whither either or neither may hit to have money. Thee, quoth a, for thy large offers I may not forget thee. You be both my friends, and therefore, indifferently, I will commend you both to Fortune's courtesy. Lady most bright, renowned goddess fair, Unto thy stately throne, here do repair Two suitors of two several qualities, And qualities indeed that be mere contraries; That one is called, wasteful Prodigality; That other cleaped, covetous Tenacity; Both at once unto your royal majesty, Most humbly make their suits for money. Nay, pleases then your pleasant fantasy, To hear them plead in musical harmony? Well, to it a Gods name, let saying go than, And eke sing for himself the best he can. Hola, satis disputatum. Your time is not yet come. At the next turning water happily. No doubt but 'tis best. I thank you, sir, 'tis honourably spoken. What, master Money, how goes the world with you? Why, where the vengea ̄ ce, where the devil hast thou Among brambles, or briers, or spirits sure, I ween. Hah, hah, would, would. But who did guide you in this labyrinth of Hah, hah, would, would. Are you not a cuck, cuck-cold? Do so, you had needs so, I may say to you. Now sure it is a world of world's to see, How all the world inclines to Vanity: Men seek at first, that is but Vanity, And loose at last that was but Vanity, And yet continue still to follow Vanity, As though it were a thing of certainty: And I that bear the name of Vanity, And see the world's exceeding vanity, In following so the tracks of vanity, Do triumph still amid my Empery, And laugh at their simplicity, That will be so miss-led by Vanity, But who is this? o I know him, ascholer of our train, 'Tis Hob a clunch, that comes for money again. Wocum, Mast Tenacity. So me thinks. I cannot tell you, 'tis hard to say; Peradventure yea, pera duenture nay. I fear me you will spend him too fast away. And dost thou indeed so well love money? What wouldst thou do with it? Chud, chud, what chud? No, nor much good (I think) to great nor small. But well, put case I procure thee to speed, You will remember your promise that I shall be feed. Stand there a while and wait. Bright goddess, behold here again Tenacity, That humbly makes his suit to have money. In vanum laboraverunt, come. Whom have we there, that keepeth such a coil? What's the matter? These be soar and cruel threatenings, marry. Is your haste so great, that by no means you may tarry? Soft, sir, a little, there is no time passed. You may tarry, you must tarry, for ought as I know: Nay, then you shall , whither you will or no. Oh rotten rope, that thou must be so brittle! Hadst thou but happened to have held a little, I had taught my princocks against another time, So to presume dame Fortune's bower to climb. To make such a escape, his hap was very good. Well, he escaped fair, I swear by the rood: But will you have me say my fantasy, Quod differtur, non aufertur. For assuredly The Gentleman will never hold himself quiet, Till once more he come to taste of this diet. Mark the end. Madam. Yea, Madam, he is gone. Lady, to do your will, I hasten willingly. Madam, here are your vassals ready pressed, To do the thing that Fortune liketh best. Why here in this place: this is Lady Fortune's palace.