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Full speech
Hadst thou been rested, all would have come forth. Faith, that same vain of railing became Now most applausive; your best Poct, is He that rails gro st. Well said, how does thy wife? But hast thou stolen all these, Valerio? See again. Call you this touching a Theorbo? Omn. would, would, would. Rinaldo, well encountered. Most sudden and infortunate, Rinaldo: Cornelio is incensed so against his wife, That no man can procure her quiet with him. I have assayed him, and made Marc Antonio, With all his gentle Rhetoric second me, Yet all I fear me will be cast away. See, see, they come: join thy wit, good Rinaldo, And help to pacify his yellow fury. Go boy, a mine honour. Forth, boy, I warrant thee. Corn oh. Signior Cornelio I Can ̄ not but in kindness tell you that Balerio by counsel of Rinaldo hath whispered all this into your ears, not that he knew any joust cause in your wise, but only to be revenged on you, for the gull, you put upon him, when you drew him with his glory to touch the Theorbo. As I am a gentleman: and if this accident of your nose had not fallen out, I would have told you this before you set too your hand. We have been at am, Drawer, call for more. Health to Gazetta, Poison to her husband. Oh, 'tis a high desert in any man To be a secret Lecher; I know some, That (Like thy self) are true in nothing else.
Plot summary
Plot — All Fools
alerio and Fortunio are both in love, but the strictness of Valerio's father Gostanzo crosses them both: Valerio has married Gratiana in secret and must keep the fact from Gostanzo, who wrongly thinks him a model of virtue; and Fortunio loves Valerio's sister Bellanora but can gain no access to her. Rinaldo resolves both problems by tellingGostanzo thatGratiana is Fortunio's wife and that his father Marc Antonio, angry at not being consulted about the match, has disowned him. Gostanzo offers to take in the 'couple' until Marc Antonio's displeasure passes; there Fortunio will learn from Valerio's good example. However, when he sees Valerio behaving amorously with Gratiana, Gostanzo insists that she leaves. Rinaldo next lodges Gratiana with Marc Antonio, telling him the truth that she is really Valerio's wife and that the story about Fortunio was a blind to gull Gostanzo. Marc Antonio believes this at first, until Gostanzo persuades him otherwise; when Valerio seeks his forgiveness for his secret marriage, he thinks this a device to deceive Marc Antonio, and gives the couple his blessing. Valerio has been made to look a fool when Cornelio and Dariotto persuade him to sing and play for them. He gets even by spreading a rumour that Dariotto has cuckolded Cornelio, who wounds the courtier in reprisal and then sets about divorcing his wife. As he is signing the divorce papers, however, he gets a nosebleed and, thinking it ominous, defers it till the next court day. On being told that the whole affair was a ruse, he tricks the arch-trickster Rinaldo into bringing Gostanzo to the tavern where he sees his son drinking and gambling. He also learns beyond doubt that both his children have married without his consent: Fortunio has taken full advantage of his access to Bellanora. Cornelio is reconciled to his wife, claiming that he merely intended to frighten her with the prospect of divorce (and gave Dariotto the opportunity to cuckold him in order to have grounds). Valerio declares that cuckold's horns are endemic in the present age.