SIMONY

Fraud our great friend. Who is that? What Fraud and Dissimulation happily found out, I marvel what piece of work you two go about? Then we are luckily well met, & sing we wish all for one thing, I would we our wills and wishing might win. Of troth agreed my Master's let it be so. Of troth you say true, for she bade us make hast, but my talk me thought savoured well, and had a good taste. Now proceed with thy tale and isle heart thee. What is your name? What more? Then your name is sir Peter Pleaseman. And please woman too now and that n, Nay I believe you but of what religion are you can you tell? Then this man is answered, sir Peter pleasi and come with m And isle prefer you straight way to my lady. I run Madam your mind shall be fulfilled. Marry madam good news: for Usury es close Hid in a rich men house, that will not let him loose, Until they see the matter brought to a good end, For Usury in this country hath many a good friend: And late I saw Hospitality carried to burying. Take no care for that, he came home yesterday even no longer, His pardon was quickly begged, and that by a Courtier. And sirrah, since he came he had Like to have slain good neighbourhood and liberality, Had not true friendship stepped between them very suddenly: But sirrah, he hit true friendship such a blow on the ear, That he keeps out of all men's sighed, for shame or for fear. But fellow Dissimulation tell me, what Priest shall marry you? Why will you not have sir Peter Pleasman to supply that want? But fellow Dissimulation, how darest thou marry with Love, bearing no love at all? For thou dost nothing but dissemble, then thy love must needs be small. Thou canst not love but from the teeth forward, Sure the wife that marries thee shall highly be preferred. Trust me thou art as crafty to have and eye to the main chance, As the taylor that out of seven yards stole one and a halt of durance. He served at that inn she devil in the likeness of S. Ratherme, Such Tailors will thrive, that out of a doublet and a pair of hose can steal their wise and Aporn . The Doublet sleeve three fingers were too short, The Vene ians came nothing near the knee. Two pieces set and handful broad to lengthen them withal, Yet for all that be w the knee by no means they could fallen. He seeing that, desired the party to buy as much to make another pair, The party did, yet for all that he stole a quarter there. Not so, but I was the willinger to tell thee, because I know it to be a true tale, And to see how Artificers do extol Fraud, by whom they bear their sale. But come let us walk, and talk no more of this, Your policy was very good, and so no doubt was his. We were arrantly flouted, railed at, and skoft in our kind, That same Conscience is a vild terror to men mind: Yet faith I care not, for I have born many more than these, When I was conversant with the Clergy beyond the Seas, And he that will live in this world must not care what such say, For they are blossoms blown down, not to be found after May. You are a Prote stant now, and I think to that now will grant You say well, but if I help you to such great preferment, Would you be willing for my pain, I shall have yearly half the gain. For it is reason you know that if I help you to a living, That you should unto me be somewhat beholding, My birth, nursery & bringing up hitherto hath been in Room, that ancient religious city: On a time the monks a friars made a banquet, whereto they invited me with certain other English Merchant's, which belike were of their fa miliaritie. So talking of many matters, amongst others one began to of the abundant substance still brought to that state. Soon said the increase of their substance and wealth, came from other Princes, and was brought thither by ealth: But the friars and monks with all the ancient company, said that it first came, and is now upholden by me Simony: which the Englishmen gave ear too, then they flattered a little too much, as English Merchant's can do for advantage when increase it does tuch: And being a shipboard merry, and overcome with drink on a day, the wind served, they hoist sail, and so brought me away: and landing here, I herd in what great estimation you were, made bold to your honour to make my repair. Doubt not fair Lady, we will not long absent be. Sirrah, being at Room, and dwelling in the Friary, they would talk how England yearly sent over a great mass of money: and that this little Island was more worth to the Pope, than three bigger Realms that had a great deal more scope: For here were smoke pence, peter pence, and powle pence to be paid, beside much other money that to the Popes use was made. Why, it is but lately since the Pope received this fine, Not much more than 33. years since, it was in Queen Mary's time. But England had never known what this great had meant, Had friar Austen from the Pope not hither been sent. For the Pope hearing it to be a little Island, sent him with a great Ar my over. And winning the victory, he landed about Rye, Sandwych, or Dover. Then he erected laws having the people in subjection, and for the most partly, England hath paid tribute so long. I hearing of the great store and wealth in the Country, could not choose but persuade myself the people loved simony. Now surely a good scholar in my judgement, I pray you of what University were you? There were many of the clergy and many of the nobiliti And many right worshipful rich Citizens, Substantial, gracious and very wealthy Farmars. But to see how the poor followed him it was a wonder, Never yet at any burial was seen such a number. Many are sorry, and say 'tis great pity that he was slain But wh be they? the poor beggarly people that so complain: As for the other they say it a cruel bloody fact, But I perceive none will hinder the murderer for this cruel act.