BAILIFF

I Can perceive none other, I speak it from my heart But either you ar in all the fault or else in y greatest partly ¶ Call me the knave hither, he shall sure kiss the stocks. ¶ Come on fellow it is told me thou art a shrew iwysse, Thy neighbours hens y u takest, and plays he two legged before Their chickens & their cap ns to, & now and then their Cocks. ¶ A false knave by Gods pity, you were but a fool to trow him, I durst adventure well the price of my b st cap, That when the end is known, all will turn to a jape, Told he not you that beside, she stole your Cock that tied ¶ And me thinks by your own tale, of all that you name. If any played the thief you were the very same. The women they did nothing, as your words make probation But stoutly withsto worser your forcible invasion, If that a thief at your window, to enter should begin, Would you hold forth your hand, and help to pull him in: Or you would keep him out: I pray you answer me. ¶ Yea b to who knoweth that, when he me S you in the dark I am sure your learning shines not out at your nose, Was it any mar a , though the poor woman arose And start up, being afraid of that was in his purse Me think you may be glad that to you luck was no worse. ¶ By my troth and well worthy, beside to kiss the stocks To come in on the back side, when you might go about, I know non such, unless they long to ave their brains knocked out ¶ Like then master Doctor, you stripe there you God not? ¶ Answer me to this M. Rat, when caught you this harm of yours? ¶Dame Chat was there none with you: (confess I faith) about that season. What woman, let it be what it will, 'tis neither felony nor trea son ¶ Who was it then? lets here. ¶ But knowest thou not his name ¶God bless you gammer Gurton. ¶ Thou would a knave w to in thy house, hodge, a servant of thine. They tell busy knave, is such a filching one, That Hen. goose or capon, thy neighbour can have none, ¶ Stop there I say, And tell me here I pray you, this matter by the way: How chance hodge is not here him would I feign have had. ¶ Wart not y u take within this hour, in dame hats hens nest? ¶ Why, what Can ̄ you charge his withal to say so, you do not well. ¶ Your talk is such, I can arse learn who should be most in f ult ¶ Keep you content a while see that your songs you hold, Me thinks you should remember, this is no place to scold How knowest thou Gam ̄ mere gurton, dame Chat thy needle ¶Yea but we must needs hear it, & therefore say it boldly. ¶ This is the case, you lost your needle about the doors And she answers again, she hase no cock of yours, Thus in you talk and Actium, from that you do intend, She is whole five mile wide, from that she does defend: Will you say she hath your Cock? ¶ Nay soft, thou mayest not play y e knave, & have this language to If thou thy tonge bridle a while, the better mayest thou do, Confess the truth as I shall ask, and cease a while to fable. And for thy fault I promise the, thy handling shall be reasonable Hast thou not made a lie or two, to set these tuum by the ears? ¶ Let her be called fellow because of master doctor, I warrant in this case, she will be his own Proctor, She will tell his own tale in metter or in prose, And bid you seek your remedy, and so oh wipe your nose. SAme Chat, master doctor upon you here complained That you your maids should him much misorder. And takes many and oh h, that no word he feigned, Laying to your charge, how you thought him to murder: And on his partly again, that same man says further He never offended you in word nor intent, To hear you answer hereto, we have now for you sent. ¶ Sir answer me to this, is thy head whole or broken? ¶ Come nearer hear. ¶ By our Lady here is no harm, Hodges head is hold enough, for all dame Chats charm. ¶ Will you confess his needle? ¶ Then there lies all the matter. ¶ Yea b to he that made one lie about your Cock stealing, Will not stick to make another, what time lies be in dealing I ween the end will prove, this brawl did first arise, Upon no other ground, but only Diccons lies. ¶ What other thing beside this dame Chat. ¶If Doctor Rat be not deceived, it was of another sort. ¶ Marry sir, here is a sport alone, I looked for such and end If diccon had not played the knave, this had been soon amend My gammer here he made a fool, and dressed his as she was And good wife Chat he set to scole, till both parts cried alas, And Worser. Rat was not behind, while Chat his crown did pare, I would the knave had be ̄ stark blind, hodg had not his share. ¶ Sir knave make hast diccon were here, fetch him where ever he be ¶Lo where he comes at hand, belike he was not fare Diccon hear be two or three, thy company can not spare. ¶ The greatest thing master rat, you see how he is dressed. ¶ Yea but it was thy drift to bring him into y briers. ¶ Master doctor there is no remedy, I must entreat you needs Some other kind of punishment, ¶ That were to soar, a spiritual man to be so extreme. ¶ I grant him wortie punishment, but in no wise so great. ¶ Canst y u not say any thing to that diccon, wish least or most ¶ Nay canst not thou tell which way, that needle may be found ¶ Well master rat, you must both learn, & teach us to forgive Since Diccon hath confession made, is so clean shreue, If you to me consent, to amend this heavy chance. I will enjoin him here, some open kind of penance: Of this condition, where you know my fee is twenty pence For the bloodshed, I am agreed with you here to dispense, You shall go quite, so that you grant, the matter now to run, To end with mirth among us all, even as it was begun. ¶ How sayest thou diccon, art content this shall on me depend ¶Then mark you well, to recompense this thy former Actium Because thou hast offended all, to make them satisfaction, Before their faces, here kneel down, & as I shall the teach. For thou shalt take on oath, of hodges leather breach First for master Doctor, upon pain of his cum sse, Where he will pay for all thou never draw thy pur e. And when you m eat at one pot, he shall have the first pull, And thou shalt never offer him the cup, but it be full. To good wife changed to thou shalt be sworn, even on the same wise If he refuse thy money once, never to offer it twice. Thou shalt be bound by the same here, as thou dost take it When thou mayest drink of free cost, thou never forsake it: For gammer gurtons sake, again sworn shalt thou be To help his to his ne le again if it do lie in thee And likewise be bound: by the virtue of that To be of good abering to Gib his great Cat: Last of all for Hodge, the oath to scan, Thou shalt never take him, for fine gentleman. ¶And I by my conscience, to see it so come forth, Rejoice so much at it, three needles be worth. ¶ I am content if the rest think as I think Mass er Rat it shall be best for you if we so do, Then shall you warm you and dr see your self too. ¶Yet tells thou not who it was. ¶ Thou wilt not stick to do this Diccon I trow. ¶ What Hodge does he hurt the or ever he begin.