ARETINA

'Tis that I came to town for, I wo'd not Endure again the country conversation, To be the Lady of six shires! the men So near the Primitive making, they retain A sense of nothing but the earth, their brains And barren heads standing as much in want Of plowing as their ground, to hear a fellow Make himself merry and his horse with whistling Sellingers round, to observe with what solemnity They keep their Wakes, and throw for pewter Candlesticks, How they become the Morris, whi whose Bells' They ring all into Whitson Ales, and sweat, Through twenty Scarffes and Napkins, till the Hobbyhorse Tire, and the maid Marrian dissolved to a jelly, Be kept for spoon meat. You do imagine, No doubt, you have talked wisely, and confuted, London passed all defence, your Master should Do well to send you back into the country, With title of Supernitendent Baily. Even so sir. A country gentleman, By your affection to converse with stable, His tenants will advance you wit, and plump it so With beef and bag-pudding. Complain to the Lord of the soil your master. I am angry with my self, To be so miserably restrained in things, Wherein it does concern your love and honour To see me satisfied. What charge more than is necessary, For a Lady of my birth and education Am I then Brought in the balance? so Sir. Have you done sir. Pray do I Like Your homily of thrift. A gamester too? Good, proceed. Have you concluded Your lecture? I'll not be so tedious, In my reply, but without art or elegance, Assure you I keep still my first opinion, And though you vay'le, your avatitious meaning With handsome names of modesty, and thrift, I find you would entrench and wound the liberty I was born with, were my desires unprivileged By example, while my judgement thought they fit, You ought not to oppose, but when the practice And tract of every honourable Lady, Authorise me, I take it great injustice, To have my pleasures circumscribed, and taught me, A narrow minded husband is a thief To his own fame, and his preferment too, He shuts his parts and Fortune's from the world, While from the popular vote and knowledge men Rise to employment in the state. Nor I to fell my honour, By living poor and sparingly, I was not Bred in that ebb of fortune, and my fate Shall not compel me too't. What ways? Do not divert, By busy troubling of your brain, those thoughts That should preserve em. 'Tis English. Decoy welcome, this visit is a favour. You oblige me Madam, but I must Not dispense so with your absence. Thou shalt command mine, prithee sweet Decoy. So you will promise to dine with me. Why then good morrow Madam. Whats your news sir? What gentlemen? Have they no names. What circumstance is this, To know him by. Whats the other? They are welcome, but Pray entertain them a small time, lest I Be unprovided. Fie, how's this hair disordered? here's a curl, Straddle most impiously, I must to my closet. Exit. Fair morning to you gentlemen, You went not late to bed by your early visit, You do me honour. What news abroad? you hold precious intelligence. And where were you last night? A Virgin? Whats her name? And is she glorious? You have been high in praises. You deserve Her favour for this noble character. You must bring us acquainted. But do not mock. I am glad to hear you sir in so good tune. I am to fit this morning. It does conclude A Ladies morning work, we rise, make fine, Fit for our Picture, and 'tis time to dine. Support me, J shall faint. Is that Frederick, In black. The boy's undone. Have J not cause? Was not J trusted with Thy education boy, and have they sent thee Home Like a very scholar. What luck J did not send him into France, They would have given him generous education, Taught him another garb to wear his lock, And shape, as gawdy as the Summer, how To dance, and wag his feather ala mode, To compliment, and cringe, to talk not modestly Like J forsooth, and no forsooth, to blush And look so Like a Chaplain, there he might Have learned a brazen confidence, and observed So well the custom of the country, that He might by this time have invented fashions For us, and been a benefit to the Kingdom Preserved our Tailors in their wits, and fav'd The charge of sending into foreign Courts For pride and antic fashions, observe, In what a posture he does hold his hat now. Some strong waters, o! I fear he's spoiled forever, he did name Logic, and may for ought I know be gone So far to understand it, I did always Suspect they would corrupt him in the College, Will your Greek saws and sentences discharge The Mercer, or is Latin a fit language To court a mistress in? Mr. Alexander If you have any charity, let me Commend him to your breeding, I suspect I must employ my Doctor first, to purge. The University that lies in's head It alters his complexion. Mr. Littleworth Be you joined in commission. I have no patience To see him in this shape, it turns my stomach, When he has cast his Academic skin He shall be yours, I am bound in conscience To see him bred, his own state shall maintain The charge, while he's my Ward, come hither sir. He gives you A noble character. I wanted such and engine, my Lord has Done me a courtesy to disclose her nature, I now know one to trust, and will employ her. Touching my Lord, for reasons, which I shall Offer to your Ladyship hereafter, I Desire you would be silent, but to show How much I dare be confident in your secrecy, I pour my bosom forth, I love a gentleman On whom there woo'not meet much conjuration To meet—your ear — Your pardon a few minutes sir—you must Contrive it thus. He may not Have the least knowledge of my name, or person. You will oblige me. I hope the revels are maintained within. How? his Mistress. Is't so? 'Tis well. I'm glad he has so much wit. This secures me, what would make other Ladies pale With jealousy, gives but a licence to my wanderings, Let him now tax me if he dare—and yet Her beauty's worth my envy, and I wish Revenge upon it, not because he loves, But that it shines above my own. Enter Alex. I have it, you two gentlemen profess Much service to me, if I have a way To employ your wit and secrecy. You gave a high and worthy character Of Celestina. Do either of you love her. She's now my guest, And by a trick invited by my husband To disgrace me, you gentlemen are held Wits of the town, the Consuls that do govern The Senate here, whose jeers are all authentic, The Taverns and the Ordinaries are Made academies where you come, and all Your sins and surfeits made times example, Your very nods can quell a Theater, No speech or Poem good without your seal, You can protect scurrility, and publish By your authority believed, no rapture Ought to have honest meaning. You must exercise The strength of both your wits upon this Lady, And talk her into humbleness or anger Both which are equal to my thought, if you Dare undertake this slight thing for my sake, My favour shall reward it, but be faithful, And seem to let all spring from your own freedom. How's that? They are here, begin not till I whisper you. C'est bien de la douceur de vostre natural que vous tenez Ceste language; mais j'espere que mon marry nam pass Manquè de vous entretenir en mon absence. Ill eut trop failly, s'il n'eust taschè de tout fon pouvoir à vous render toutes sorts de services. Vrayement Madame, que jamais person a plus desire, L'honneur de vostre company, que moi. Vous m'obligez trop. Passion of my brain. I am un done. There's a compliment. J vous pry Madame worser execuser less habits, & le rude Comportment de mon cousin. Ill est tout fraischement Venum de l universitiè, ou on l'a tout gastè. I am disho nor'd. O most unpardonable! get him off Quickly, and discreetly, or if I live — What shall I do? Try your skill, Master Littleworth. Nephew Frederick ! Now gentlemen. Ex. all but Cel. & Alex. & Little. Is she gone. Some love letter — He smiles upon. Now Mr. Alexander, you look bright o'the sudden, Another spirit's in your eye. I blush my own thoughts, Some strange face gove me, The ways are east already and we thrive When our sin fears no eye nor perspective. Exit. Well, turn about Frederick, very well. Am I not now a proper gentleman? The virtue of rich clothes! now could I take The wall of Julius Caesar, affront Great Pompey's upperlip, and defy the Senate, Nay I can be as proud as your own heart Madam, You may take that for your comfort; J put on That virtue with my clothes, and J doubt not But in little time, J shall be impudent As any Page or Players boy, J am Beholding to this gentleman's good discipline, But J shall do him credit in my practice, Your Steward has some pretty notions too In moral mischief. Your desert in this Exceeds all other service, and shall bind me Both to acknowledge, and reward. You Can compliment. Who is this? Rich and glorious! Your case is altered sir. Now he looks brave and lovely. Sir, it will But dull the appetite to hear more, and mine Must be excused, another time I may Be your guest. A coach will easily convey it, or You may take water at strand bridge. The Thames will cool. I will keep it cold Of purpose, I am confident He knows me not, and I were worse than mad To be my own betrayer, hre's my husband. Enter Born. You are merry, as You came from kissing Celestina. I have herd as much Bestowed upon a dull faced chambermaid Whom love and wit would thus commend, true beauty Is mocked when we compare thus, it self being Above what can be fetched to make it lovely, Or could our thoughts reach some thing to declare The glories of a face, or bodies elegance, That touches but our sense, when beauty spreads Over the soul, and calls up understanding To look when thence is offered, and admire, In both I must acknowledge Celestina Most excellently fair, fair above all The beauty's I would seen, and one most worthy Men love and wonder. I know not with what lose, I should attempt her love, she is a piece So angellically moving, I should think Frailty excused to dote upon her form, And almost virtue to be wicked with her. Exit. But hath Sir Thomas lost five hundred pounds Already? If we both waste so fast, we shall soon find Our state is not immortal, some thing in His other ways appear not well already. Enter sir Thomas. Do you not vex within for't? But when Dice have consumed all; Your patience will not pawn for as much more. Say you so? I'll have another coach to morrow If there be rich above ground. This gown J have worn Six days already, it looks dull, isle give it My waiting woman, and have one of cloth of gold embroidered, shoes and pantables Will show well of the same. And to morrow have I invited half the Court To dine here, what misfortune 'tis your company And ours should be divided? after dinner J entertain e'm with a play. If you have not Pointed the place, pray bring your Ladies hither, J mean to have a Ball to morrow night, And a rich banquet for e'm, where we'll dance Till morning rise, and blush to interrupt us. What mean you? A mon'th good, And what shall be done then. 'Tis very pretty. Enter Decoy. Madam Decoy. A Lady. He's here. Where have you been cozen? How? Would you practice upon me? Nephew. The boy's frantic. No more. I hope your fire is quenched by this time. He has sack enough, and I may find his humour. Exeunt. You are glorious In mind and habit. Your other clothes were not so rich, who was Your tailor sir? These ways are costly. You make me wonder sir, to see this change Of fortune, your revenue was not late So plentiful. Strange of such a sudden, To rise to this estate, no fortunate hand At dice could lift you up so, for 'tis since Last night, yesterday, you were no such Monarch. It cannot be A Mistress, though your person is worth love, None possibly are rich enough to feed As you have cast the method of your riots, A Princess, after all her Jewels must Be forced to fell her provinces. A rich one. Dare you trust my security. You astonish me, who can supply these? Not that I wish to know More of your happiness, then I have already Heart to congratulate, be pleased to lay My wonder. Which isle die Ere I'll betray. I'll loose the benefit of my tongue. Sir I beseech you. What devil? How I tremble. Goodness defend me, did you see her? But would you venture Upon a devil? How black And impudence is this? But are you sure It was the devil you enjoyed. De'e not quake? 'Tis a false glass, sure I am more deformed, What have I done, my soul is miserable. Enter Lord. You expressed Your noble care of me my Lord. Enter Bornwell, Celestina. As you Do hope for heaven withdraw, and give me but The patience of ten minutes. Heaven has dissolved the clouds that hung upon My eyes, and if you can with mercy meet A penitent, I throw my own will off, And now in all things obey yours, my nephew Send back again to'th college, and my self To what place you'll confine me. I beg your presence, And pardon. Already I feel a cure upon my soul, and promise My after life to virtue, pardon heaven, My shame yet hid from the world's eye. Do you expect to find The devil true to you. I'll voice it Louder, to all the world your horrid sin, Unless you promise me religiously, To purge your foul blood by repentance sir. Not while I have power To encourage you to virtue, isle endeavour To find you out some nobler way at Court To thrive in. Her favour. J vous pry Madam do excuser l'importunitè de mes affairs Qui m' ont fait offenser, par mon, absence, d'un dame de laquelle I'ay receu tant do obligation. De la vostre plustost Madame que vous fait donnerai D'interpretation si benign à ses efforts. What friend? 'Tis a she friend I'll follow gentlemen, We may have a game before you go You have a pleasant humour sir. You have lost. You are charitable. You shall conclude me when you please. Not for the world be seen here, we are lost, I'll visit you at home; but not to practice What she expects, my counsel may recover her. Although it shame My self, I must be just, and give her all The excellency of women, and were I A man. How sir a Witch?