in A New Wonder, A Woman Never Vexed — Rowley, William; Heywood, Thomas (?)
Metadata
Play
A New Wonder, A Woman Never Vexed
Author
Rowley, William; Heywood, Thomas (?)
Year (catalogued)
1632
First performance
1611
Decade
1630s
Genre
Comedy
Play type
Adult Professional
Company
Unknown
Speech prefix(es)
King. | Kin.
Words
425
Characters
2375
Typicality
0.57 (cosine to cluster centroid)
TCP id
A11153
BritDrama no.
2084
Cluster
Cluster 2 — Allegory, Nature & pageant voices
Important excerpts
No keyword-matching excerpt could be extracted (the cluster label doesn't share vocabulary with this character's speech).
Full speech
Oh! welcome is all love, our peoples shouts In their hearts language, make our benvenues, Most high and sovereign; we return all thanks Unto our loving Citizens, chiefly to you Sir, Whose pious work invites our Majesty to royalize This place with our best presence, accompanied with this Reverend Cardinal; would we might, after many broils, End our days in these religious toils; We would work most faithfully; but bounteous Sir, How do you call your buildings? The house of God, it is too good to change, pray you proceed. And honourable work, and deserves large memory. Prithee be a false Prophet. Let now our Heralds in the streets proclaim, The title, and office, of this hospital; Make known to all distressed travelers, that We'll accept this charitable house, this Domus Dei: Shall be their free fojourne, as is proposed. What are these petitioners? Rise, your duty's done, your petitionsshall need No knees, so your intents be honest, does None here know them? A wonder, Master Sheriff, you mean for beauty. A wonder in a woman; What is't I prithee? You may boast it largely; it's a Subject's happiness Above a Q enes; Have you suits to us? What art thou? This may your vices cause. We hear, speak on, we know the parties, ach one relate his grief, and if it lie in us, We'll yield relief; it's first requisite that we Know of you Sir, the cause of this your Sons disinheritance You fallen betwixt two pillars Sir, is't not so? With and impartial ear we have herd your Loving story, it's both fair and honest. You bless mine eyes with objects that become The theater of Kings to look upon. This union's good, such league should ever be in bro therhood. What is't I prithee? You have prevented well, so has this good Alderman, I wish you many Scholars. You have vexed her now Sir, how do you answer that? You have a wonder Master Sheriff, a priceless jewel. The liveliest harmony that ere I herd; All instruments compared to these sweet tunes, Are dull and harsh; I joy to see so good a child. A woman wonder, brother's reconciled; You worthy Sir, did invite us to a feast, We'll not forget it, but will be your guest, Because we'll view these wonders over again, Whose records do deserve a brazen Pen, But this above the rest, in golden text, Shall be insculpt; A Woman never Vexed. A worthy work, the better being done in the Founders ere, Not left unto succession.
Plot summary
Plot — A New Wonder, A Woman Never Vexed
Old Forster has recently made his fortune by marrying a rich widow, but they are both dissatisfied with the financial irresponsibility of his brother and son, whom ===== PAGE 17 ===== 1624 they are on the point of disowning. Robert, the son, has purloined some of his stepmother’s money to buy his uncle, Stephen Forster, out of debtors’ prison; he also gives Stephen money to buy new clothes. Stephen uses the money for gambling, and is cheated. Robert is disappointed to find him in the gaming-house, and he himself likewise gets into trouble with his stepmother for going there, even though he only went in to look for Stephen. Mistress Forster has an uncommonly even- tempered friend, another rich widow, who enjoys miraculous good fortune. When she loses her wedding ring in the river, it turns up inside a salmon bought by her maid. She meets Stephen at the gaming-house and likes him. She suggests that he should marry for money, and offers herself. He accepts, and they perform a hand-fasting. Jane is being pursued by two undesirable suitors, an old knight and a young fool. Her father, Alderman Brune, suggests Robert Forster as a third option, if he can be reconciled with his father. Brune is Old Forster’s partner in a mercantile venture, but accepts Forster’s offer to buy him out; he takes payment in cloth rather than cash, which clears Forster’s warehouses for the new merchandise due in any day. However, Forster continues to look askance at Robert. News arrives that the ships have sunk in the Thames: Forster is bankrupt, and voluntarily commits himself to prison in order to avoid his creditors. Stephen takes charge of his new wife’s property, and proves, against expectations, to be provident rather than spendthrift. He asks Robert to help him manage the estate, and adopts him as his heir, insisting only that he does nothing to help his father. However, Stephen himself pays the prison-keeper to ensure that his brother remains comfortable. When Jane’s two other suitors complain of the favour shown to Robert, Stephen produces evidence that they are in debt to the widow’s first husband (and therefore now to him), and the threat of arrest gets rid of them. The widow generously accepts their payment of £200 to discharge a debt of ten times that amount. Unable to resist his sense of filial obligation, Robert purloins the money and gives it to his father. Stephen pretends to be angry, but secretly pays off his brother’s creditors and thereby secures his release.…