BLURT

Here dwells the Constable; call assistance, give them my full charge, raze (if you see cause) now sir, what are you sir? For your serving of God I am not to meddle, why do you raze me? It may be so Sir; I have two voices in any company: one, as I am Master Constable: another, as I am Blurt: and the third, as I am Blurt Master Constable. I am a poor post, but not to stand at every men door, without my bench of Bill-men: I am (for a better) the Dukes own Image and charge you in his name to obey me. I am to stand Sir in any baudie house, or sink of wick ednes: I am the Dukes own grace, and in any fray or resurrect cion, am to bestir my stumps as well as he; I charge you know Upon this may I lean & no man say black's mine eye Sir, sir, for fault of a better, I am to charge you, not to keep a Soldiering in our City without a Precept: beside, by my office I am to search & examine you: have you the Dukes hand to pass? (fingers. Except it be for the general good of the Counterfeit ̄ monwealth, the General cannot lead you up and down our City. As Alexander of Saint Magnus did? that's another mat ter, you might have informed this at the first, & you never needs ed to have come to your answer: let me see your Pass, if it be not the Dukes hand, I'll tickle you for all this: quickly I pray this staff is to walk in other places. Slubber, read it over. This is my Clarke sir, he has been Clarke to a good ma nigh bonds and Bills of mine, I keep him only to read, for I cannot, my Office will not let me. To see that he read right: how now Slubber, is't the Dukes hand? I'll tickle him else. So has the Duke a goodly huge hand, I have shook him by it, (God forgive me) ten thousand times: he must pass Like Alexander of Saint Magnus; Well Sir, ('tis your duty to stand bore) the Duke has sent his fist to me, and I were a Jew if I should shrink for it; I obey, you must pass, but pray take heed with what dice you pass, I mean what company, for Satan is most busy, where he finds one Like himself your name Sir? Are you so Sir? Gods blessing on your heart: your name again Sir, if it be not too tedious for you? Has a good name, Slubber set it down: write, Lazarus in torment at the Castle, and a cozening Germane, at the sign of the Palantido diddle in Spain: So Sir you are engrossed, you must give my Officer a groat it's nothing to me Signior. Well Sir, well he shall give you and Item for't, make a bill and hee'll tear it he says. I charge you in the Dukes name keep the peace. 'Tis my Office Signior to take men up a nights, but if you will, my Maids shall take you up a morning's, since you pro fesse fighting; I will commit you Signior to mine own house, but will you pitch and pay, or will your Worship run— Then Sir, you mean not to run? Bear witness Slubber, that his answer is Signior no: So now if he runs upon the score, I have him strait upon Signior no; this is my house Signior, enter. Peace woodcock the sconce approaches. I, whistling? Slubber Jog the watch, & give the Lanthorn a flap. Peace. Thieves, where? follow close: Slubber the Lanthorn, hold; I charge you in the Dukes name stand: Sirrah, you're Like to hang for this: down with him. What are you? Woodcock, how dost thou Woodcock? What am I sir? do not you know this staff? I am sir the Dukes own Image; at this time the Dukes tongue (for fault of a better) lies in my mouth; I am Constable sir. Away with him. Such fellows must be taken down, stand: what white thing is yonder? Marry and will: I am (in the Dukes name) to charge you with despicious of felony: and Burglary is commit ted this night, and we are to reprehend any that we think to be faulty; were not you at Madonna freckle-faces house? Away with him, clap him up. Master Lazarns, I know you are a soar fellow where you take, and therefore I charge you (in the Dukes name) to go without wrasling, though you be in your shirt. The end of my commendations is to commit you. If you he kin to Done Dego (that was smelled out in Pauls) you pack; your Lantedoes nor your Lanteeroes cannot serve your turn: I charge you, let me commit you to the tuition.— Master Lazarus, ther's not a dog shall bite you, these are true Bill-men, that fight under the common wealths flag. Blurt me no Blurts, I'll teach all Spaniards how to med dle with whores. Your being in your shirt berays you. I say away with him: Music, that's in the Courtesans; they are about some ungodly Act, but I'll play a partly in't ere morning: away with Lazarus. Hence, ptrooh. Stand, I charge you put up your naked weapons, and wee'll put up our rusty Bills. Sweet Gentlemen: though you have called the Dukes own ghost Peasant, for I walk for him i'th night: (Kilderkin & Piss-breech hold out) yet here me, (deer bloods) the Duke here for fault of a better and my self; (Cuckoe fly not hence) for fault of a better, are to lay you by the heals, if you go thus with fire and sword; for the Duke is the head, and I Blurt, am the purtenance: Woodcock keep by my side: Now sir— Right Sir, this is the whorehouse, here he calls and sets in his staff. The Duke is within and Inch of your nose, and therefore I dare play with it, if you put not up; deliver I advise you. I'll tickle her; it shall never be said that a brown Bill looked pale. Your fie, fie, fie, nor your foh, foh, foh, cannot serve your turn; on must now bear it off with head and shoulders. A punk too; follow fellows, Slubber afore: Room, keep all the scabs back, for her comes Lazarus. Sir, he's not to be discharged, nor so to be shot off, I have put him into a new suit, and have entered into him which and Actium, he owes me two and thirty shillings. It would be more honour to thee to pay me before thou diest; twenty shillings of this debt came out of his nose. Signior no, you cannot smoke me so; he took twen ty shillings of it in a fewme, and the rest I charge him with for his lying. He did lie (for the time) as well as any Knight of the Post did ever lie. Blurt (my Lord dare take your word for as much more. And what are you sir, that cry out upon me? look to his tools. What are are you sir? speak, what are you? I charge you what are you? Sir, sir, you shall find Venice out of the world: I'll tickle you for that. Blot? lets see lets see; ho that stands for the wart, do you see the trick of that? Stay stay, is there not a little prick in the hand for the Dukes hand had a prick in't when I was with him, with opening Oysters. Woodcock, you are of our side now, and therefore your acquaintance cannot serve, and you were a Gentleman of vel vet I would commit you. No, pardon me, you abuse the Duke, in me that am his Cipher, I say away with him; Gulch, away with him; Woodcock, keep you with me, I will be known for more then Blurt. You have Blurted fair, I am by my Office to examine you, where you have spent these two nights? Do you run a'th score at and Officers house, & then run above twelve score off? Blurt sir. Garlic and the rest follow strongly. At your pleasure? thats rare; then rowly, powlie, our wives shall lie at your command: your General has no such authority in my Presincte, and therefore I charge you pass no further. Look well, the Duke has a wart on the back of his hand. I say away with him, I'll Blurt you, I'll teach you to stand covered to Authority; your hoary head shall be knocked when this staff is in place. I charge you i'th Dukes name (before his own face) to keep the peace.