EUNUCHUS

Madam. The Dukes of Venice and Ferrara, Are with your father entered the walls Unto the funerals of Julia. I hope your Ladyship— True Madam. At your service Lady. stand aside. I did an't Like your grace. Some six hours hence. I can to please your Lordship: How so'ere my Fortune's make me now a slave I was a free born Christians son in Cyprus, When Famagusta by the Turk was sacked: In the division of which City spoils, My Fortune's fell to Mulleasses lot: Nor was it Tyranny enough that I was Captive, My parents robbed of me, and I of them, But they wronged nature in me, made me and Eunuch, Disabled of those masculine functions, Endue from our sex: and thus subjected, These sixteen years unto the vild command, Of and imperious Turk, I now am given To serve the hidden secre S of his lust, Unto Timocl a, the wife of Borgias, Whose private mixtures I am guilty of: Betwixt hese three I stand as in a maze, I eg'd to all their sins, and made a baud To lust and murder: Mulleasses first Gives me unto Timoclea, that without suspect I might procure their loves sec rity: For which they promise me my liberty. Eut Borgias whither jealous of his wife, Of reaching at some further policy, Binds me with golden offers to his trust, And first commands me rumour it abroad Timoclea his wife was sick, when at that instant She was in health and dancing with her Turk . Now I must second that report with death, And say abroad Timoclea is dead: Short warning for a journey unto heaven: But (which amaz that most) I must provide The body of some groom to stop a coffin with. This is a riddle of some Sphinx, let Oedipus Unfold the meaning: I leave it to th'euent, And think most safety in not knowing it. I must provide some groom, thats my command. Prosper me Saturn, and those stars of sin, Whose influence makes villains fortunate. He kills by law that kills men for a state. But who comes here? o my spruce he—lecher That makes his boy save him the charges of a bawdy house, Before Mahomet and excellent fellow for my Lords coffin: Assist me power of wit. Before heaven and excellent reason. My honoured Lord: My duty. The Lord Protector Borgias my master— Your instant presence. A tumult amongst the fearful multitude, Caused by and ominous terror in the heavens, Is as I guess the reason of your want. The Sun on sudden feels a dark eclipse And hides his silver face behind the moon, As loath to see some prodigies appear. The days eyes out, a thousand little stars Spread Like so many torches, about the sky, Make the world show Like Churches hung with black, And set with tapers at some funeral: Amongst these stars directly from the East, A firy meteor points a burning rod At Florence. What answer shall I return unto my Lord? This is the hour I should meet my catamite Signior Bordella : I cannot but laugh to see the slave make a lecherous progress to Lucifer. The moral will hold rarely: he shall have his brains fly about his ears in the hight of his vene ry: this instead of going to Tymoclea shall conduct him to the bed of Borgias : a amid whose waking plots & state volutio ̄ S, the amorous youth must needs be heartily welcome: for mine own partly, my handshall be clear from the blood of the goat & yet I could account it happiness to be within ear shot of his depar ture, to here how lamentably the coxcomb would sighs out Ty moclea : but the best is, neither Court nor country will much miss the fool: there are elder brother's enough to supply his room: Enter Board la. And see where the Cocoloch appears: he passes as if he would steal to hell without company: whist Signeor. The same: now I see thou wilt stand to thy word. Then I perceive you will shortly be at my Ladies mercy H ere Sir, and look your entrance be wary, soft and circumspect. How, know him, can I mistake him sir, that is never hoodwinckt? he is and extreme enemy to Haberdashers: affecting no block, but that which nature bestowed on him: and of that he hath be so curious that it is not a hair amiss: he is sir the reface to your compoundresse of men flesh, and Ushers her to mployment: and is a creature of singular patience; contenting himself with the Theory, when others are the Practic. In his pace he imitates Fencers, and stands much upon distance: He is partly and Astronomer too, being much given to observation of signs: for when the Sun is in Gemini the Dogstar attends without doors: he is a great friend to Aries but naturally hates Pisces for it is a chill sign and cools his toes over-vehemently: in brief sir he is a Gentleman Usher. Impart them S gn or : it may be I shall add to your store: these La yes will n to discover us for intelligencers: they are nam turally given to the concealment of private actions. Cans not say the Court-grace? promise man promise. I take it that it comes of the Latin word posse to make a man able: and that's the reason ever after eating them, men de sire to make experience of their forces. And that may well be: for I remember that reverent pedagogue William Lily, brings in gigno, pono, can , one in the neck of another, gigno to beget, pono to put in, and canon to sing. You speak of the days of hunger, when the slave was a stranger in the land of Havilah : but the word is retrograde: the last age is a golden age with him. Thou seest we are feeding the flesh man, what dost thou talk of the spirit? Why hers a slave in folio will seem to slight the love of a P inc sse, when he would willingly spend his talon on and oy ster with e. Nor I neither: and yet I speak of their understandings, which by reason of a general spring, halt and debility in their hamms (heavens know) are most falteringly feeble: but to pre sent the message I am sent for: to your worthiest self, from my La die and mistress the protectors wife: you are intelligent? Heavens grant she may have the virtue of attraction: for she hath laid open, the luster of her best parts to your grace Sir: nay make not retreat Sir: she knows you disdain her love. True Sir, but with a firm belief of your rising a gain. The harder is her fortune: but hear me, me thinks reward should prick you on with more courage, to such and hono rabble encounter. It may be you grounded your oath upon the uncleans of your shirt. Sfoot I thought some soul cause or other, interposed it self betwixt you and my Lady: But sir, I'll see all wants supplied, thy debts satisfied, thy Fortune's eternally mounted: only be tractable to my poor lovesick Lady and mistress, joust and lo ving. By this hand sir but I will not: do not fail sir at eight of the clock to meet me here, where I'll deliver you the key of my Ladies chamber: with further instructions in the business, and with assuredness of preferment and promotion. My hand and promise for it. Would would would: Protector, here's a slave Shall stuff thy coffin: him thou shalt sacrifice Unto Timocleas ghost, whose humorous soul Shall in his passage over Acheron Make Charon laugh, and the stern judge of hell Smile at his folly: this is the fatal key Conducts him to those shades by Borgias hand. Thus fools must fallen, that wise men firm my stand. I Sir, but Ladies are of the nature of Idols and will be served on your knees. O no: his flight Lady is Like the Ravens, that having spied a fat carckase, Rome's about to calmore of her fellows to the prey. S oot I thought the Dogfish had be baiting Cerberus ere this time. Oh spare me. You are secure: that shape that named your love Pursued me through the court, till for my rescue Fear made me use this violence at your chamber. Oh I am slain, and die a causeless death, I never lived false to thee: all thou hast gained Is that my soul die clear and leaves thine stained. He die. Who, Madam Fulsome the Governess of the maids? she is a good creature and very musical: she sets more e instruments awork then a Fiddler: thou must needs love her if it were but for her humility: she will bend her self to the meanest page of the Scullery: and she hates the pride of the flesh exceedingly, and is known to be a mortifier of carnality. ut that see are but petty observations: I have seen since my coming to Florence the son of a Pedlar mounted on a foot cloth: a fellow created a Lord for the sm othn sse of his chin: and which is more; I have seen a Cap most my racu lously turned into a beaver hat without either trimming or dres sing. I think the Cuckoe foresings his own dirdge: Signi or, you shall need no further prescriptions: in the carriere of your delight, vouchsafe a thought of Eunchus, you conceive me Sir, manifest my service to Timoclea. I have it, thanks sweet Thalia, thou hast begotten a child of mirth in my brain, I will put it to this creature of Flo rence to n rse: Saucy Seignior. Doings: in faith courtly and weak: Cupid help the poor Ladies. My love and service. It shall be done.