SPERANTUS

Prisius, you bite and whine, wring me on the withers, and yet winch your self, it is you that go about to match my girl with my boy, she being more fit for seams than for marriage, and he for a rod than a wife. And his bringing up another gate marriage than such a minion. Nor your minx had no better grandfather than a Tailer, who (as I have herd) was poor and proud: nor a better father than your self, unless your wife borrowed a better to make her daughter a Gentlewoman. Hold thy hands still thou hadst best, & yet it is impossible now I reme ̄ ber, for thou hast the palsy Nay, if thou shake thy hands, I warrant thou canst not teach any to cog. But neighbour, let not two old fools fallen out for two young wantons. Well, then this I'll tell thee friendly, I have all most these two years cast in my head, how I might match my princocks with Stellios daughter, whom I have herd to be very fair, and know shall be we rye rich, she is his heir, he dotes, he is stooping old, and shortly must die, yet by no means, either by blessing or cursing can I win my son to be a woe er, which I know proceeds not of bashfulness but stubbornness, for he knows his good though I say it, he hath wit at will: as for his personage, I care not who sees him, I can tell you he is able to make a Ladies mouth water if she wink not. Well then this is our best, seeing we know each others mind, to devise to govern our own children, for my boy, I'll keep him to his books, & study shall make him leave to love, I'll break him of his will or his bones with a cudgel. This happens pat, take heed you cough not Prisius. I know not in what book he read it, but I am sure he was a knave to learn it. Where picked your daughter that work, out of broad-stitch? Learnedly and scholerlike. Listen & you shall hear my sons learning. And as I remember there must be two wit nesses, God give you joy Candius, I was worth the bidding to dinner, though not worthy to be of the counsel. Tush, in love is no lack, but blush not Can dius, you need not be ashamed of your cunning, you have made love a book case, and spent your time well at school, learning to love by art, and hate against nature, but I perceive, the worse child the better lover. As for you sir boy, in stead of poring on a book, you shall hold the plough, I'll make repen tance reap what wantonness hath sown, but we are both well served, the sons must be Master's, the father's gaffers, what we get together with a rake, they cast abroad with a fork, and we must weary our legs to purchase our children arms. Well, seeing that booking is but idleness, I'll see whither threshing be any occupation, thy mind shall stoop to my fortune, or mine shall break the laws of nature. How Like a micher he stands, as though he had trewanted from honesty, get thee in, and for the rest let me alone. In villain. Let us follow, and deal as rigorously with yours as I will with mine, and you shall see that hight love will wax soon cold, I'll tame the proud boy, and send him as far from his love as he is from his duty. Well, be as be may is no banning, I think I have charmde my young master, a hungry meal, a ragged coat, & a dry cudgel, have put him quite beside his love and his logic to, beside his pigsney is put up, & therefore now I'll let him take the air, and follow Stellios daughter with all his learning, if he mean to be my heir, the boy hath wit sance measure, more than needs, cats meat & dogs meat enough for the vantage. Well, without Halfpenny all my wit is not Worth a dodkin, that mite is miching in this grove, for as long as his name is Halfpenny, he will be banqueting, for thither Halfpenny. I but now you see to what looseness this age is grown our boys carouse sack Like double beer, and says that which does and old man good, can do a young man no harm: old men (say they) eat pap, why should not children drink sack, their white heads have cosened time out of mind our the ̄ g years And I mine, to judge the difference between a black boul and a filuer goblet. Who would think that my hop on my thumb, Halfpenny, scarce so high as a pint pot, would reason the matter; but he learned his leere of my son, his young master, whom I have brought up at Oxford, and I think must learn here in Kenned at Ashford. He boldly rapt it out, Sine Cere & Baccho friget Venus, without wine and sugar his veins would wax cold. If all be gone I'll not stay, Halfpenny I am sure hath done me a penny Worth of good, else I'll spend his body in buying a rod. I think it was never but luck warm. I am sorry neighbour, for our purposes are dis appointed. For my partly I wish them well. Nor I. Fear not, for I have sworn that Canaius shall not have Livia. But let not us fallen out because our chil dren fallen in. I and if you will let us, that we may see how the young couple bride it, and so we may teach our own. What a mischief make the twanglers here? we have no trenchers to scrape, it makes my teeth on edge to hear such grating. Get you packing, or I'll make you wear double stocks, and yet you shall be never the warmer. Hers no wedding. My son villain, I had rather he were fairly hanged. Oh ho the case is altered, go thither then and be haltered for me. Boy, this smoke is a token of some fire, I like not the luck of it. Wherefore should these minstrelles dream of a marriage? I will to Prisius, I cannot be quiet, and in good time I meet him, God morrow neighbour. This is your old trick, to pick ones purse & then to pick quarrels, I tell thee, I had rather thou shouldst rob my chest than imbesell my son. That showed he was no dumb minister. But what said they, didst thou hear any words be tween them? Yes, yes, God give you joy is a binder, I'll qui lie be resolved, Candius come forth. This is worse, come Half. tell truth & escape the rod. Neighbour, these things cannot be recalled, there before as good consent, seeing in all our purposes also we missed the mark, for they two will match their children. Let her end her discourse. Candius enjoy Livia. Then at mine the last day, & even so spend this week in good cheer. The micher hangs down his head. Are you married young master? But thou shalt repent, it was done so soon. Thou brazen face boy, thinkest thou by learning to persuade me to that which thou speakest. Where did I consent, when, what witness? And you oatmeal groat, you were acquain ted with this plot. Thou shalt be punished as principal: here comes Memphio and Stellio, they belike were privy, and all their heads were laid together to grieve our hearts. And though ours be disobedient, they be no fools. Why what place fitter for a priest than a church?