TAFFETA

Come loved Adriana here let us fit, And mark who passes; now for a wager, What coloured bear'd comes next by the window? I think not so, I think a red, for that is most in fashion, Lord how scarce is the world of proper men And gallants; sure we never more shall see A good leg worn in a long silk stocking, With a long codpiece, of all fashions That carried it i'faith, what's he goes by? I know him not, a looks joust Like a fool. Ah how light a treads For durting his silk stockings, I'll tell thee what, A witty woman may with ease distinguish, All men by their noses, as thus: your nose Tuscan is lovely, large and brawde, Much Like a Goose, your valiant generous nose. A crooked smooth and a great puffing nose, Your scholars nose is very fresh and raw For want of fire in winter, and quickly smells, His chops of mutton, in his dish of porrage. Your Puritan nose is very sharp and long, And much Like your widows, and with ease can smell, And edifying capon some five streets off, He will be gone if we neglect to stay him. No I have't stand a side, Aye me my handkertcher Adriand, Fabian. Run, run I have let my handkertcher fallen, Gentleman shall I entreat a courtesy, Sir most hearty thanks: please you come in Your welcome shall transcend your expectation. And why? Belike you think it base and servant-like, To feed upon reversion, you hold us widows, But as a pie thrust to the lower end That hath had many fingers int before, And is reserved for grose and hungry stomachs. A trivial Idle jest, 'Tis for a man, of your repute, and note, To credit fortunetellers, a petty rogue, That never saw five shillings, in a heap Will take upon him to divine men's fate, Yet never knows himself, shall die a beggar, Or be hanged up for pilfering tablecloaths, Shirts and smocks, hanged out to dry on hedges, 'Tis merely base, to trust them, or if there be, A man in whom the Delphic, God hath breathed, His true divining fire, that can foretell, The fixed decree of fate, he likewise knows, What is within the everlasting book, Of Destiny decreed cannot by wit, Or men Invention be dissolved, or shunned, Then give thy love free scope embrace and kiss, And to the distafe sisters leave th'euent, Choose what you will of time, There lies your way. Did you call sir. Then fare you well. Adriana, makes a no stay. I prithee see if he have left the house, Peep close, see, but be not seen: is a gone. What does he now? Blows the wind there. What does he now? Gone Adriana. Sure he's taken. Come, thou must help me now, I have a trick To second this beginning, and in the neck, To strike it dead i'faith, women must woe, When men forget what Nature leads them too. What sayest thou then to Nimble Sir Oliu. Smal-shanck 'Tis true he is the man, Yet will I bear some dozen more in hand, And make them all my gulls. Why sir, With what audacious front can you entreat To enjoy my love, which yet not two hours since, You scornfully refused. Which I shall put to trial, lend me thy ear. Will you perform so much. Make him subscribe it, and then I vow, By sacred Vesta's ever hallowed fire, To take thee to my bed. He's worthy love, whose virtues most excel. I have set the fool in hope, ha undertook To rid me of that fleshy Captain Face, Which swears in Taverns, and all Ordinaries, I am his lawful wife: he shall allay, The fury of the Captain, and I secure, Will laugh at the disgrace they both endure. Ex: Then good sir do it, Widow's are seldom slow to put men to it. Yet search him well, And we shall find no pith or hearty Timber To underlay a building. But shall I not be ouer-cloyde with love? Will you nor be too busy shall I keep My chamber by the month, if I be pleased To take Physic, to send for Visitants, To have my maid read Amadis de Gaul, Or Donzel deal Phoebo to me? shall I have A Carotch of the last edition, The Coachman's seat a good way from the Coach, That if some other Ladies and my self Chance to talk bawdy, he may not overhear us. Shall we have two chambers? And will you not presume unto my bed, Till I shall call you by my waiting maid. And when I send her, Will you not entice her to your lust, Nor tumble her before you come to me. What noise is that, go see Adriana, And bring me word: I am so haunted With a swaggering Captain, that swears God bless us Like a very Tarmagant, a Rascal knave, Enter Adr. That says he will kill all men which seeks to wed me. What are you afraid Sir Oliver? None Sir. Sir get you gone. Leave my house, or I will have you conjured With such a spell, you never yet have herd of, Have you no other place to vent your froth, But in my house, is this the fittest place, Your Captainship can find to puff in: would! How now you slave, one call the Constable. Captain Face, for my last husbands sake, With whom you were familiarly acquainted, I am content to wink at these rude tricks, But hence, trouble me no more, if you do, I shall lay you fast, where you shall see No Sun or Moon. Sir, get you gone, You swaggering, cheating, Turne-bul-streete rogue, Or I will hale you to the common-jail, Where Lice shall eat you. Run to the Counter, Fetch me a red-bearded Sergeant, I'll make You Captain think the Devil of hell is come To fetch you, if he once fasten on you. Call up my men, Enter 2. or 3. with clubs. Where be these knaves, have they no ears or hearts, Beat hence this rascal, some other fetch a warrant, I'll teach him know himself. Gentlemen I am sorry you should be thus disturbed Within my house, but now all fear is passed, You are most welcome: supper ended, I'll give a gracious answer to your suit, Mean while let nought dismay, or keep you mute. Ex. Sir you are merry, Your supper sir was light. But I hope you think you welcome. Thats not aloud. Unless you were son to a welch Curate: But faith sir Knight I have a kind of itching, To be a Lady, that I can tell you woes, And can persuade with better rhetoric, Then oaths, wit, wealth, valour, lands, or person, I have some debts at court, and marrying you, I hope the Courtier will not stick to pay me, Yes faith Adriana, How a complete gallant? what? a fellow, With a hat tuck't up behind, and what we use, About our hips to keep our coats from dabbling, He wears about his neeke, a farthingale: A standing collar to keep his neat band clean, The while his shirt does stink, and is more foul, Then and in of chancery table cloth, His breeches must be pleyted as if a had Some thirty pockets, when one poor halfpenny purse, Will carry all his treasure, his knees all points, As if his legs and hammes were tied together, A fellow that has no inside, but prates By roate, as players, and parrots use to do, And to define a complete gallant right, A mercer formed him, a taylor ma him, And a player gives him spright, Come not near me, I forbid the my house, my outhouses, My Garden, Orchard, and my backside, Thou shalt not harbour near me. What would you sir with us, That on the sudden, and so late you come. It shall not needs, I hope I have not brought her up so ill, But that she knows how to contain your secrets, As well as I her Mistress: Therefore on. Now sir, what's your will? Are these your secrets? I am none of those, Stand up, I more desire a man should stand, Then cringe and creep that means to win my love, I say stand up, and let me go ye'ad best. How now sir sauce, Would you be capering in your father's saddle, Away you casheerd younger brother, begun, Do not I know the fashions of you all, When a poor woman has laid open all Her thoughts to you, then you grow proud and coy, But when wise maids dissemble and keep close, Then you poor snakes come creeping on your bellies, And with all oiled looks prostrate your selves, Before our beauty's sun, where once but warm, Like hateful snakes you strike us with your stings, And then forsake us, I know your tricks begun. Here me but speak. Where be these lazy knaves? some raise the house, What meant the cry of murder? where's my love? I find no fault, and I protest Sir Oliver. I'ld not have lost the last two hours sleep, I had by him, for all the wealth you have. Because the first word he speaks is the Devil Take his soul, and who will give him trust, That once has given his soul unto the Diveil. And i'faith If the best partly of a man be once gone, The rest of the body is not worth a rush, Though it be never so handsome. Come in faith you do: And let me tell you thats but ceremony, For though the Pie be broken up before, Yet says the proverb, the deeper is the sweeter. And though a capons wings and legs be carved, The flesh left with the rumpe I hope is sweet. I tell you sir, I have been wooed, and sued to, By worthy Knights of fair demeans: nay more, They have been out of debt, yet till this hour, I neither could endure, to be in love. Or be beloved, but proffered beware is cheap. whats lawful thats loathed, and things denied, Are with more stronger appetite pursued. I am to yielding. Come in faith you do: And let me tell you thats but ceremony, For though the Pie be broken up before, Yet says the proverb, the deeper is the sweeter. I should entreat your secrecy sir, fare you well. What dost thou say To Throat the Lawyer? Theres no offence, My mind is changed. 'Tis all in vain. I prithee keep close. Then heres my hand, I am your wife condition we be joined, Before to morrows sun. How sir. What then. Can you play better. I'll marry him sir, No. No by my worth I dare not wed, men say yare nought yowl cheat And you do keep a whore. How could she then maintain you, I take thy love. I'll wed to morrow. To let me tell thee, I'll love thee while I live, For this attempt give me that lusty lad, That wins his widow with his well drawn blade, And not with oaths and words: a widows wooing, Not in bore words but should consist in doing, I take thee to my husband. I hope sir what ere our husbands be, We may be honest. That oath does show you are a Northern Knight, And of all men alive, I'll never trust, A Northern man in love. And trust me so it is, I never saw A man that sooner could captive my thoughts (Since I writ widow) then this gentleman, I would a would look up. Thats not so good To stoop and take up, My handkertcher.