OTTER

Not so Princess, neither, but under correction, sweet Princess, gi'me leave—these things I am known to the Courtiers by. It is reported to them for my humour, and they receive it so, and do expect it. Tom Otters Bull, Bear, and Horse is known all over England, in rerum naturam. The Horse then, good Princess. And it is a delicate fine Horse. Poetarum Pegasus. Under correction, Princess, Jupiter did turn himself into a— Taurus, or Bull, under correction, good Princess. Sir. Sic visum superis. Gentlemen, my Princess says, you shall have all her Silver Dishes, festinate: and she's gone to altar her Tyre a little, and go with you— Yes Sir, I do mean it: but I would entreat my Cousin Sir Amorous, and you Gentlemen, to be Suitors to my Princess, that I may carry my Bull, and my Bear, as well as my Horse. But they are decoram, and that's better, Sir. Oh God! that I could have said as much! I will have these Stories painted in the Bear-garden, Ex Ovidii Metam morphosi. That I shall, Sir. I have brought my Bull, Bear, and Horse, in pri vate, and yonder are the Trumpeters without, and the Drum, Gentlemen. And we will have a rouse in each of them, anon, for bold Britons, i'faith. To see me bring up my Bull, Bear, and Horse to fight. Be afraid of nothing. Gentlemen, I have placed the Drum and the Trumpets, and one to give them the sign when you are ready. Here's my Bull for my self, and my Bear for Sir John Daw, and my Horse for Sir Amorous. Now set your foot to mine, and yours to his, and— Saint George, and Saint Andrew, fear no Cousin's. Come, found, found. Et rauco strepuerunt cornuacantu. Sir Amorous, you must not aequiuocate. It must be pulled down, for all my Cousin. You must pull the Horse on his knees, Sir Amorous: fear no Cousin's. Jacta est Alea. Wife! Buz. Titinilitium. There's no such thing in nature. I confess, Gentlemen, I have a Cook, a Laundress, a House-Drudge, that serves my necessary turns, and goes under that title: But he's and Ass that will be so uxorious, to tie his affections to one Circle. Come, the name duls appetite. Here, replenish again: another bout. Wives are nasty, sluttish Animals. As ever the Earth bore, tribus verbis. Where's Ma ster Tru-wit? Agreed. Now you shall have the Bear, Cousin, and Sir John Daw the Horse, and I'll have the Bull still. Found Tritons of the Thames. Nunc est bibe dum, nunc pede libero — A Wife is a scurvy Clogdogdo; and unlucky thing, a very foresaid Bear-whelp, without any good fashion or breeding: mala bestiam. His Wife is brought out to bear him. A pox—I married with six thousand pound, I. I was in love with that. I have not kissed my Fury these forty weeks. She has a breath worse then my Grandmothers, profecto. And she has a Perruke, that's Like a pound of Hemp, made up in Shoo-thrids. A most vile face! and yet she spends me forty pound a year in Mercury, and Hogs-bones. All her Teeth were made i'the Black- Friars: both her eyebrows i'the Strand, and her Hair in Siuer-street. Every partly of the Town owns a piece of her. She takes her self asunder still when she goes to bed, into some twenty Boxes; and about next day noon is put together again, Like a great Germane Clock: and so comes forth and rings a tedious alarm to the whole House, and then is quiet again for and hour, but for her quarters. have you done me right, Gentlemen? She falls upon him and beats upon him, Oh, hold, good Princess. Under correction, deer Princess: look to my Bear, and my Horse, Gentlemen. No, I protest, under correction— They are both run away, Sir. Good Gentlemen, help to pacify my Princess, and speak to the great Ladies for me. Now must I go lie with the Bears this fortnight, and keep out of the way, till my peace be made, for this scandal she has taken. Did you not see my Bullhead, Gentlemen? Oh, here it's. And you come over, Gentlemen, and ask for Tom Otter, wee'll go down to Ratcliffe, and have a course i'faith: for all these disasters. There's bona spet left. Please you, Master Doctor. I would hear the Canon law speak first. It's no presumption, Domine Doctor. He cannot open this too much, Sir, by your favour. Of which there are several species. If you contract your self to one person, thinking her another. If she be a Beggar, and you thought her rich. If she prove stubborn, or headstrong, that you thought obedient. I, ante copulam, but not post copulam, Sir. I, but Master Doctor, those servitudes are subla e, now, among us Christians. You shall give me leave, Master Doctor. I: do you know, what the degrees are, Sir? That comment is absurd, and superstitious, Master Doctor. I cannot endure it. Are we not all Brother's and Sisters, and as much a kin in that, as Godfathers, and God-daughters? You may have it done for you, Sir. That's superstitious, too. I, or affinitas orta ex sponsalibus: and is but leave imp dimentum. Which is no less veram affinitas, then the other Ma ster Doctor. You say right, venerable Doctor. And, nascitur ex continued, quod per coniugium duae personae efficiuntur unam caro — Et vere filius qui sic generatur — I, that is impedimentum gravissimum. It does utterly annul, and annihilate, that. If you have manifestam frigi ditatem, you are well, Sir. I, or if there be morbus perpetuus, & insanabilis, as Paralysis, Elephantiasis, or so— You say troth, Sir, and as it is in the Canon Master Doctor. That a Boy, or child, under years, is not fit for mar riage, because he cannot reddere debitum. So your omnipoten tes — Your impotentes, I should say, are minime apti and contrahenda matrimonium. Very well, Sir. Absurd, absurd, absurd, and merely Apostatical. You can prove a Will, Master Doctor, you can prove nothing else. Do's not the Verse of your own Can xan say, Haec socianda vetant connubia, fanctam retractant — In aeternum, Sir. It's false in humanity, to say so. Is he not prorsus inutilis and Thorum? Can he praestare fidem datam? I would feign know. He cannot connulere, it is impossible. I say, he is adulter manifestus, then. And prostitutor uxoris, and this is positive. And therefore, if he be manifest frigidus, Sir— Why, that was my conclusion. Then frigiditatis causam — She may have libellum divortii, against you. If you confess it. And clear my self in Foro Conscientiae — Exercende potestate. I Will not endure it any longer. Ladies, I beseech you help me. This is such a wrong, as never was offered to poor Bride before. Upon her Marriage day, to have her Hus band conspire against her, and a couple of Mercenary Come panions, to be brought in for forms sake, to persuade a See paration! If you had blood, or virtue in you, Gentlemen, you would not suffer such Earwigs about a Husband, or Scorpions, to creep between Man and Wife— I, it is the same in Theology. Marry Sir, in errore qualitatis (which Master Doctor did forbear to urge) if she be found corupta, that is, vitiated or broken up, that was pro virgin desponsa, espoused for a Maid— It does dirimere contractum, and irritum reddere too. I, the question is, if you have carnaliter, or no. It is enough: a plain nullity. I am of Master Doctors resolution too, Sir: if you made not that demand, ante nuptias. Yes Sir, in primo gradum.