LOVEWIT

What should my Knave advance, To draw this company? He hung out no Banners Of a strange Calf, with five legs, to be seen? Or a huge Lobstar, with six claws? He has no gift Of Teaching i'the nose, that ere I knew of! You saw no Bills set up, that promised cure Of Agues, or the Toothache? Nor herd a Drum struck, for Babouns, or Puppets? What devise should he bring forth now? I love a teeming wit, as I love my nourishment. pray God he have not kept such open house, That he hath sold my hangings, and my bedding: I left him nothing else. If he have eat them, A plague of the Moath, say I. Sure he has God Some baudy Pictures, to call all this Ging; The Friar, and the Nun; or the new M cion Of the Knights Courser, covering the Parsons Mare; The Boy of six year old, with the great thing: Oh it may be, he has the fleas that run at ilt, Upon a Table, or some Dog to Dance? When saw you him? How! You amaze me, Neigh bours. Would? It's no time to question, then. This's strange! that none will answer! Didst thou hear A cry, sayest thou? These be miracles, or you make them so! A man and hour strangled, and could not speak, And both you herd him cry? Thou art a wise fellow. Give me thy hand, I pray thee. What trade art thou, on? A Smith? Then, lend me thy help, to get this door open. I'the name of wonder, What means the fellow? What? with the Plague? stand thou the ̄ farther. Who had it then? I left None else, but thee, i'the house. How! Breath less, and farther off. Why this is stranger! The Neighbours tell me all, here, that the Doors Have still been open. Gallants, Men, and Women, And of all sorts, tagrag, been seen to flock here In threaves, these ten weeks, as to a second Hogs-den, In days of Pimlico, and Eyebright. To day, they speak Of Coaches, and Gallants; one in a French-hood, Went in, they tell me: and another was seen In a Velvet Gown, at the windore. Diverse more Pass in and out. Strange! Do you but think it now? And but one Coach? Fine Rogues, to have your testimonies built on! Peace, and get hence, you Changelings. Yes, Sir. What Knaves? What Cheaters? pray you stay, Gentlemen. What means this? This is something, sure! Here comes another. Good Gentlemen, a word. The world's turned Bethlehem. It mazes me! Who's that? It's i'the house. Would! List. Peace, you— Oh, is it so? Then you converse with spirits. Come Sir. No more o'your tricks, good leremy, The truth, the shortest way. Good Neighbours, I thank you all. You may depart. Come Sir, You know that I am and indulgent Master: And therefore conceal nothing. What's your medicine, To draw so many several sorts of wildfowl? But by me, who came Sooner then you expected. Well: Let's see your Widow. What warrant have you? Is there and Officer, there? Have but patience, And I will open it straight. Yes, my Brain? Hold. Hold Gentlemen, what means this violence? Good Gentlemen, hear me. Are you Officers, And cannot stay this violence? Gentlemen, what is the matter? Whom do you seek? Fewer at once, I pray you. Goodzeale, lie still, A little while. The House is mine here, and the doors are open: If there be any such persons, as you seek for, Use your authority, search on of Gods name. I am but newly come to town, and finding This tumult about my door(to tell you true) It somewhat mazed me; till my Man, here, (fearing My more displeasure) told me had done Somewhat and insolent partly, let out my house (Belike, presuming on my known aversion From any air o'the town, while there was Sickness) To a Doctor, and a Captain, who, what they are, Or where they be, he knows not. You may go in, and search, Sir. Here, I find The empty Walls, worse then I left'hem, smoked, A few cracked pots, and Glasses, and a Furnace, The Seeling filled with To sies of the Candle: And Madame, with a Dildo, writ o'the walls. Only one Gentlewoman, I met here, That is within, that said she was a Widow— And should have married a Spanish Count, buthe, When he came to't, neglected her so grossly, That I, a Widower, am gone through with her. Were you the Done, Sir? Good faith, now, she do's blame you extremely, and says You swore, and told her, you had taken the pains, To die your beard, and umbre over your face, Borrowed a Suit, and Ruff, all for her Love; And then did nothing What and over sighed, And want of putting forward, Sir, was this! Well fare and old Hargubuzier, yet, Could prime his poulder, and give fire, and hit, All in a twinkling. What sort of Birds were they? Think you so Sir? By order of Law, Sir, but not otherwise. Sir, I can take no knowledge, That they are yours, but by public means. If you can bring certificate, that you were gulled of them, Or any formal Writ, out of a Court, That you did cousin your self; I will not hold them. That you shall not, Sir, By me, in troth. Upon these termesthey' are yours. What should they have been, Sir, turned into Gold all? What a great lose in hope have ou sustained? For what, my zealous Friends? What is that portion? What, those i'the Cellar, The Knight, Sir Mammon claims? Mine earnest vehement Butcher, And Deacon also, I cannot dispute with you, But, if you get you not away the sooner, I shall confute you, with a Cudgel. I shall send you To Amsteredam, to your Cellar. Another too? Away you Harry Nicholas, do you talk? You lie, Boy; As found as you: and I am afore-handwith you. Come, will you quarrel? I will feize you, sirrah. Why do you not buckle to your tools? What do you change your copy now? Proceed, Here stands my Dove: stoop at her, if you dare. Oh do you so, Sir. Fill a pipe-full, Jeremy. We will. I will be ruled by thee in any thing, Jeremy. Whiff in with your Sister, brother Boy. That Master That had received such happiness by a Servant, In such a Widow, and with so much wealth, Were very ungrateful, if he would not be A little indulgent to that Servants wit, And help his fortune, though with some small strain Of his own candor. Therefore Gentlemen, And kind Spectators, if I hau out stripped And old men gravity, or strict canon, think What a young Wife, and a good Brain may do: Stretch Ages truth sometime, and crack it too. Speak for thy self, Knave. Why? what's the matter?