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Full speech
Look up, sweet Win-the-fight, and suffer not the enemy to enter you at this door, remember that your education has been with the purest, what polluted one was it, that named first the un clean beast, Pig, to you, Child? Oh! resist it, Win-the-fight, it is the Tempter, the wicked Tempter, you may know it by the fleshly motion of Big, be strong against it, and it's foul temptations, in these assaults, whereby it broacheth flesh and blood, as it were, on the weaker side, and pray against it's carnal provocations, good child, sweet child, pray. What shall we do? call our zealous brother Busy hither, for his faithful fortification in this charge of the adversary; child, my deer child, you shall eat Pig, be comforted, my sweet child. I mean i'the Fair, if it can be any way made, or found lawful; where is our brother Busy? Will he not come? look up, child. Slander not the Brothers, wicked one. Oh brother Busy ! your help here to edify, and raise us up in a scruple; my daughter Win-the-fight is visited with a natural disease of women; called, A longing to eat Pig. And I would be satisfied from you, Religiously-wise, whither a widow of the sanctified assembly, or a widows daughter, may commit the act, without offence to the weaker sisters. Good Brother, Zeale-of-the-land, think to make it as lawful as you can. Truly, I do love my child dearly, and I would not have her miscarry, or hazard her first fruits, if it might be other wise. I, and I'll go with you my self, Win the-fight, and my brother, Zeale-of-the-land, shall go with us too, for our better con solation. Son, were you not warned of the vanity of the eye? have you forgotten the wholesome admonition, so soon? It is and edifying consideration. Brother Zeale-of-the land ! what shall we do? my daugh ter Win-the-fight, is fallen into her fit of longing again. To see some sights, in the Fair. I child, so you hate them, as our Brother Zeal do's, you may look on them. Good brother Zeal! What do you mean, wicked men? And shall he not into the stocks then? Oh, I thank you, blessed, honest men! Is he mad? Now heaven increase his madness, and bless it, Comes a gain. and thank it, Sir, your poor handmaid thanks you. Yes, I have a warrant out of the word, to give thanks for removing any scorn intended to the brothers. Oh me! in the stocks! have the wicked prevailed? Oh good Sir, they have set the faithful, here to be wone der'd at; and provided holes, for the holy of the land. Mad do they call him! the world is mad in error, but he is mad in truth: I love him o'the sudden, (the cunning man said all true) and shall love him more, and more. How well it becomes a man to be mad in truth! Oh, that I might be his yokefellow, and be mad with him, what a many should we draw to madness in truth, with us! Sir, I love you, and would be glad to be mad with you in truth. Verily, I can be as mad in spirit, as you. Good Sir, vouchsafe a yoakefellow in your madness, shun not one of the sanctified sisters, that would draw with you, in truth. I must uncover my self unto him, or I shall never enjoy him, for all the cunning men's promises. Good Sir, hear me, I am worth six thousand pound, my love to you, is become my rack, I'll tell you all, and the truth: since you hate the hyporisie of the party-coloured brotherhood. These seven years, I have been a wilful holy widow, only to draw feasts, and gifts from my in tangled suitors: I am also by office, and assisting sister of the Deacons, and a devourer, in stead of a distributer of the alms. I am a special maker of marriages for our decayed Brothers, with our rich wid dowes ; for a third partly of their wealth, when they are married, for the relief of the poor elect: as also our poor handsome young Virgins, with our wealthy Bachelors, or Widowers; to make them steal from their husbands, when I have confirmed them in the faith, and God all put into their custodies. And if I have not my bargain, they may sooner turn a scolding drab, in to a silent Minister, then make me leave pronouncing reprobation, and damna cion unto them. Our elder, Zeale-of-the-land, would have had me, but I know him to be the capital Knave of the land, making him self rich, by being made Feoffee in trust to deceased Brothers, and cozening their heirs, by swearing the absolute gift of their inhe ritance. And thus having eased my conscience, and uttered my heart, with the tongue of my love: enjoy all my deceits together. I beseech you. I should not have revealed this to you, but that in time I think you are mad, and I hope you'll think me so too, Sir? Most zealously, it is that I zealously desire.
Plot summary
Plot — Bartholomew Fair
Bartholomew Cokes has two objectives in life: to visit the fair which shares his name, and to marry Grace Wellborn, who, as a ward, faces a financial penalty should she refuse. He sends his servant Wasp to Littlewit the proctor to obtain a marriage licence, but then, impatiently, comes himself. He brings Grace with him, and she attracts the interest of Winwife, present with his friend Quarlous as a suitor to Littlewit’s mother-in-law, Dame Purecraft. Littlewit is more interested in Cokes’s talk of the fair, having secretly written one of the puppet plays to be performed there. The only snag is that the puritanical Dame Purecraft will disapprove of their visit, thinking fairs profane. Busy, an elder of Purecraft’s church, advises the family that fairs may lawfully be visited for good reason, and comes along with them to partake of the pork. After some unfortunate experiences involving mistaken identity, Justice Overdo no longer trusts informers and has decided to do his spying personally. He visits the fair in disguise to seek out ‘enormities’ perpetrated by the fairground folk. He is impressed by one young man, Edgeworth, and decides to rescue him from the clutches of the cheaters; but he does not know that Edgeworth is a cutpurse. While Overdo is busy telling him about the wickedness of tobacco, Edgeworth steals Cokes’s purse; Overdo gets the blame. When it happens a second time, Overdo is arrested and put in the stocks. There he encounters the madman Trouble-All, who persistently demands Overdo’s warrant for any action; it transpires that he was a court official driven out of his mind by Overdo’s own actions. The watchmen, concerned to get better authority, release Overdo from the stocks for the time being. Meanwhile, the Littlewits arrive at the fair, but Busy becomes over-excited in his condemnation, attacks the fairground booths, and is arrested; Dame Purecraft goes after him, leaving Littlewit and Win free to enjoy themselves. Edgeworth tricks Wasp into making affidavit so that, at Quarlous’s instigation, he can steal Cokes’s marriage licence. Wasp too is arrested and put in the stocks, but escapes by a ruse when Overdo and Busy are put in beside him. The women visitors to the fair are separated from the men. Littlewit leaves Win in the care of two fairground bawds while he goes off to check the arrangements for his puppet show. Cokes abandons Grace and Mistress Overdo to try and get back his stolen property. Desperate for the toilet, Mistress…