ROBIN

Sir. My Mistress Sir, I do call her Mistress, as I do call you Master, but if you would have me call my Mistress to my Master, I may call loud enough before she can hear me. And so she may have at Supper too for ought I know, but I can assure you she is not now within my call. To tell you true sir, I shall neither find my Mistress here, nor you your Gelding there. While you were busy about your writings, she came and commanded me to saddle your Beast, and said she would ride abroad to take the air. None sir. Oftener I am sure then she goes to Church, and leave out Wednesdays and Fridays. If you call that alone, when no body rides in her company. Commonly when you are abroad, and sometime when you are full of business at home. Only conjures me that I shall keep it from you, then claps me in the fist with some small piece of silver, and then a Fish cannot be more silent then I. Now you have expressed your mind, I know what I have to do; first, not to tell her what I have told you &, next to keep her side-saddle from coming upon your Geldings back; but how soever it is Like to hinder me of many a round tester. You say well in that sir, I dare take your word, you are and honest Gentleman, and my Master; and now ache mine as I am your true servant, before she shall back your Gelding a gain in your absence, while I have the charge of his keeping; she shall ride me, or I'll ri e her. Good news for me, I shall sir. Yes sir, I so remember it, that most certain it is I ne for shall forget it, my mouth waters ever since when I but think on't, while you w re at supper above, the drawer had me down into the Cellar below, I know the way in again if I see't, but at that time to find the way out again, I had the help of more eyes than mine own: is the taste of that Ipsitate S ill in your pal lat sir? I shall: never c'ud I have met with such a fair oppor tunitie: for joust in the mid way lies my sweetheart, as lovely a lass as any is in Lancashire, and kisses as sweetly see her go king or coming, i'll have one smouch at thy lips, and be with thee to bring Mal Spencer. Thou art a witty rogue, and thinkest to make me believe any thing, because I saw thee make thy broom sweep the house without hands tother day. I your old sweet heart Laurence? Old love will not be forgotten Thy belly full wench. Go fetch it quickly then. I would but see that. Light, it comes; and I do think there is so much of the Devil in't as will turn all the milk shall come in't these seven years, and make it burn too, till it stink worse than the Pro verb of the Bishops foot. My horse is gone, nay prithee Mal. thou hast set him a uva , leave thy Roguery. There stands a black long-sided jade: mine was a trussed grey. Nay but, nay but. Come away then, heigh for Lancaster: stand up I have known when you have held me for and honest fellow, and would have believed me. And carry a Wench behind me too, and did something else too, but I must not speak of her lest I be devil-torn. I am sorry I have said so much, and not let Lancaster have the credit of the Wine. I could say sir, that you might have the better opinion of the Wine, for there are a great many palates in the Kingdom that can relish no Wine, unless be of such a Tavern, and drawn by such a Drawer— Nay then sir I swore, and I swear again , honest Jack Pain drew it. Much good do you sir, your Wine and your mirth, and my place for your next Groom, I desire not to stay to be laughed out of my opinion. Now will I push him over and over with a piece of paper: Yes sir, I have brought you something from London. Your honest Drawer sir, considering that you consi der'd him well for his good wine— Was very careful to keep or convey this paper to you, which it seems you dropped in the room there. I Mistress. What other horse you please Mistress. Truly Mistress pray pardon me, I must be plain with you, I dare not deliver him you; my master has taken notice of the ill case you have brought him home in diverse times. You may say your pleasure. Awe. You say well mistress, you have jaded me (a pox take you for a jade.) Now I bethink my self how damnably did I ride last night, and how devilishly have I been rid now. My horse, my horse, I would I were now some country Major, and in authority, to see if I would not venture to rouse your Satanical sisterhood: Horse, horse, see thou be, & where point thee, Can y me: is that the trick on't? the devil himself shall be her carrier next if I can shun her: & yet my Mr. will not be leave theres any witches: theres no ru ning away; for I neither know how nor whither, beside to my thinking, theres a deep di changed, & a hie quickset about me, how shall I pass the time? What place is this? it looks Like and old bairn: isle peep in at some cranny or other, and try if I can see what they are doing. Such a bevy of beldames did I never behold; and . Like so many Cormorants: Marry choke you with a miss chief. A murrein take you, I am sure my hoofes paid for't. I pray Mistress ride me as you would be rid. Nay then I'll try Conclusions. Mare Mare, see thou be, And where I point thee carry me. Yes sir, he's broad buttocked and full flanked, he does not bore and ace of his flesh. Not sir since you backed him. Who I sir, may I die sir, if you find me in a lie sir. Well sir, find what you can, him you shall find, and what you find else; it may before that, instead of Gramercy horse, you may say Gramercy Robin; you will believe there are no Witches! had I not been late bridled, I cooed have said more, but I hope she is tied to the rack that will confess some thing, and though not so much as I know, yet no more then I dare justify— Have you found your Gelding sir? I hope not spurred, nor put into a sweat, you may see by his plump belly and fleeke legs he hath not been soar travailed. I hope sir you find none feeding there but your own, if there be any you suspect, they have nothing to champeon, but the Bridle. The Mare you mean sir? Old do you call her? You shall find the mark still in her mouth, when the Bridle is out of it? I can assure you it's your own Beast. I'll not persuade you to any thing, you will believe nothing but what you see, I say the Beast is your own, and you have most right to keep her, she hath cost you more the currying, then all the Combs in your Stable are worth. You have paid for her Provender this twenty years and upward, and furnished her with all the that she hath worn, of my Knowledge, and because she hath been ridden hard the last Night, do you renounce her now? I am sure I owned her no ade the l st time I rid her, she carried me the best partly of a hundred Miles in less then a quar ter of and hour. I pray do Sir, but take heed lest when the Bridle is out of her mouth, she put it not into yours; if she do, you are a gone man: if she but say once Horse, horse, see thou be. Be you rid (if you please) for me. You will believe no Witches? I am Robin, and this your wife, my Mrs. A Bridle, ugling Bridle Sir. Take heed Sir what you do, if you cast it hence, and she catch it up, we that are here now, may be rid as far as the Indies within these few hours, Mistress down of your Mares bones, or your Mary-bones whither you please, and confess your self to be what you are; and that's in plain English a Witch, a grand notorious Witch. So it appears by the story. What chee e sir, show your self a man, though she ap pear'd so late a Beast; Mistress confess all, better here than in a worse place, out with it. A match sir, you shall find me as mute as if I had the Bridle still in my mouth. I shall Sir, well now my Mistress hath promised to give over her Witchery, I hope though I still continue her man, yet she will make me no more her journeyman; to prevent which the first thing I do shall be to burn the Bridle, and then a way with the Witch. You have taught me silence. Sir I shall. By your le we Sir. I your Father? he was a man I always loved And honoured. He bred me. I do this? I am a horse again if I God you, Master, why Master. And so did I, by a Devilish token, I was rid thither, though I rid home again as fast without switch or spur. Mal, adieu sweet Mal, ride your next journey with the company you have there. And Mrs. the horse that stays for you rides better with a Halter than your gingling bridle. I confess my stay with thee is sweet to me, but I must spur Cut the faster for't, to be at home in the morning, I have yet to Lancaster to ride to night, and this my of bottles, to fill to night, and then half a score mile to ride by cur rie-combe time, i'the morning, or the old man chides Mal. Pray Bacchus I may please him with his wine, which will be the hardest thing to do; for since he was last at London and tasted the Divinity of the Miter, scarce any liquour in Lan cashier will go down with him, sure, sure he will never be a Pu ritane, he holds so well with the Miter. Yes Sir. I think I have nettled him now, but not as I was nettled last night, three hundred Miles a Night upon a Rawbone Devil, as in my heart it was a Devil, and then a Wench that shared more of my back then the said Devil did of my Bum, this is rank riding my Master's: but why had I such and itch to tell my Master of it, and that he should believe it; I do now wish that I had not told, and that he will not be leave it, for I dare not tell him the means: God's-foot my Wench and her friends the Fiends, will tear me to pieces if I discover her; a notable rogue, she's at the Wedding now, for as good a Maid as the best o'em—Oh my Mistress. Yes, I have reason to know it after my hard journey, they say there be light women, but for your own partly, though you be merry. Yet I may be sorry for your heavi ness. A pox upon your tail. A pox take them, must only they feed upon hight meat, and I upon nothing but cold salads The brides posset on my life, nay if they come to their spoon meat once, I hope theil break up their feast presently. No doubt Sir. There Sir. Yes so I say, ither the worser ell or she did; an't please you in and take off her , and then tell me who hath more right to her, you or . Be patient I beseech you, what do you mean Sir?