HOBS

Theres another King and you could hit on him, one Harry, one Harry, and by our Lady they say, he's the honester man of the two. What if I do? A dogs death, le not meddle with it, for by my troth I know not when I speak treason, when I do not, theres such halting betwirt two Kings, that a man cannot go up right, but he shall offend tone of them, I would God had them both for me. No, is he in the country? The devil he is, God bless his Mastership: I saw a woman here that they said was the Queen, she's as Like my daughter, but my daughter is the fairer, as ever I see. God make him and honest man, I hope thats well spo ken, for byth mouse foot, some give him hard words, whither be rues um or not, let him look to that, isle meddle of my cow hide, and let the world slide. The devil in a dung cart, how these roisters swarm in the try now the King is so near? God liver me from this, for this Like a heese, but a man cannot tell amongst these Courtnoles whose true. No such matter, I have more haste of my way. My purse thou meanest, I am no good fellow, and I pray God thou be'st not one. Thought is free, and thou art not my ghostly father. Who knows that but thy self? I pray God he spy not my purse. Upon thy oath isle stay: now, what sayest thou to me? Speak quickly, for my company stays for me beneath at the next style. His majesty, whats that? his horse, or his mare? Grace quotha? pray God he have any: which King dost thou choir for? I know not so many, for I tell thee I know none, mar rye I hear of King Edward. By my hollida e, thats the best term thou gaust him yet, he's high enough, but he has put poor King Harry low enough. Nay, I cannot tell, but he has put him down, for he has God the crown, much good doot him with it. Dost thou not know me? Gods bl w budkin, has the knave served me so? farewell, may lose h S, horns, and mare & all, by prating with thee. I had as lieve go alone: Would, would, a merry Jig, why man, Brock my mare knows would and ree, and will stand when I cry ho, and let me get up and down, and make water when I do. It's out of my way, but I begin to Like thee well. Of the kings thou meanest, art thou no blab if I tell Thee. Mass they say King Harry's a very aduowtrie man. He's a frank franion, a merr companion, and loves a wench well, they say he has married a poor widow because shecs fair. No by my feckens, but the better, for though I be a plam Tanner, I love a fair lass my self. Faith as poor folks love holidays, glad to have them now and then, but to have them come too often, will und them, so to see the king now and then ti's comfort, but everse day would beggar us, and I may to Thee, we fear we shall be troubled to lend him no money, for we doubt he's but needy. By my hallidome yes, he shall have half my st , and isle ell sole leather to help him to more. Nay, thats coúnsel, & two may keep it, if one be a way. Art and isde of that? Harry's of the old house of Lan casber, and that progenitie do I love. Dost thou? well if I were Constable, I should be forsworn if I set the not in the stocks for it. Thou art the arranter knave to speak ill of thy ma ster, but sirrah whats thy name, what office hast thou? and what will the King do for thee? The worser vel he will, he's the more fool, and so isle tell him, if ere I see him, & I wouid I might see him in my poor house at Tamworth. Ye must be cleanly I tell ye, for there comes a Courtnole hither to night, the kings master ships Butler, Ned, a spruce youth, but beware you be not in love nor over taken by him, for Courtiers be slippery lads. Come fit down to supper: go to Nell, no more sheeps eyes, you may be caught I tell you, these be licorish lads. Daughter, call Dudgeon and his fellows, weel have a three men song, to make our guests merry. Nails what courtnoles are ye? yéele neither talk nor cate, What news at the court? do somewhat for your meat. Well, God be with good King Henry, faith the come mons will take it as a common thing, death's and bonest man, for he spares not the King: for as one comes, another's tave away, and seldom comes the better, thats all we say. Come fill me a cup of mother Whetstones ale, I may drink to my friends, and driven down my tale. Here Ned and Tom I drink to you: and yet if I come to the court, I doubt yowl not know me. I would I had not, condition she had all. But I have a knave to my son, I remember him by you, even such and thrist as one of you two, that spends all on gay clothes and new fashions, and no work will down with him, that I fear heel be hanged, God bless you from a better fortune, yet you wear such filthy bréeks, Lord, were not this a good fashion? yes, and would save many a fair penny. Agreed, agreed, come, solemnizing, solemnizing, solemnizing, fa, fa, fa, say Dudgeon. Agencourt, Agencourt, know you not Agencourt. Where the English slew and hurt, all the French foemen: With our Guns and bills brown, Oh the French were beaten down, Morris pikes and bowmen, &c. So should I faith, I should strain a noate for him: Come take away, and lets to bed, ye shall have clean sheets Ned, but they be course, good strong hemp, of my baughters own spinning and I tell thee, your Chamber pot, must be a fair horn, a badge of our occupation, for we buy no bending peauter, nor bending earth. Farewell to you both, commend me to the king, & tell him I would have been glad to have seen his worship here. I, do master Hadland do, they say you sold a foul deal of dirty land for fair gold and silver, let the king have some now while you have it, for if ye be forborn a while, all will be spent, for he that cannot keep land that lies fast, will have much a do to hold money, its slipperic beware, 'tis melting beware, 'tis melting beware. Mass and 'tis well thy Curs have left so much, I thought they would have eaten up thy house and landere this. Hear you worships, will you let me answer my neigh bour Grudgen? By my hallidome Harry Grudgen, tha'rt but a grumbling, grudging Churl, thou hast two ploughs going, and near a Cradle rocking, tha'st a peck of money, go to, turn Thee lose, thou'lt go to law with the Micat for a tyth goose, and wilt not spare the King four or five pound. Thart no honest man to twit me with my son, he may out live thee yet for ought that he has done, my sons ith gail, is he the first has been there, and thou rt a man, as thart a beast, I would have thee by the ears. His benegligence? hang him heel not give a pennis willingly. Twenty old Angels and a score of hides, if that be too little, take twenty Nobles more, while I have it my king shall spend of my stor . Shall he i'faith, I thank you heartily, but hear the Gentleman, you come from the Court? Lord how does the King, and how does Ned the Kings Butler, and Tom of his Chamber, I am sure you know them? For want of better guests they were at my house one night. They promised me a good turn for kissing my daugh ter Nell, and now I would cagion to try them, my sons in Die hell here in Caperdochie, itha Gail for peeping into a neither men purse, and outstep the King be miserable, he's Like to totter, can that same Ned the Butler do any thing with the King? A halter he can, by my troth ye reiounce my heart to hear it. I'll wean Brock my maressole, and come up to the King, and it shall go hard but two fat hens for your pains I will bring. What have you saved now goodman Grudgen, by your hinching and your pinching, not the worth of a black pudding. Gramercy honest Tom, where is the hangman Ned? where is that mad rascal, shall I not see him? What Ned? a plague found thee, how dost thou for a villain? how dost thou mad Kogue, and how, and how? Faith he's in Caperdoche Ned, in Stafford Goal, for a robbery, and is Like to be hanged, except thou get the King to be more miserable to him. Ever when they play and Enterloute or a Commodity at Tamworth, the King always is in a long beard, and a read gown Like him, therefore I spekt him to be the King Dudgeon, dost thou he are, look well to Brock my mare, driven Dun and her fair and softly down the hill, and take heed the thorns tear not the horns of my Cow hides, as thou goest near the hedges: would what sayest thou knave? is the Bulls hide down? why lay it up again, what rare I? He meet thee at the style, and help to set all straight. And yet God help, its a crooked world, and and unthrifty, for some that have never a shoe, had rather go barefoot, then buy clo -leather to mend the old, when they can buy no new, for they have time enough to mend all, they fit so long between the cup and the wall, well God amend them, God amend them. Let me see by my executor here, my leather pouch, what I have taken, what I have spent, what I have gained. what I have lost, & what I have laid cut: my taking is more the ̄ my spending, for heres store left. I have spent but a groat, a penny for my two jades, a penny to the poor, a penny pot of ale, and a penny cake for my man and me, a dicker of Cow hides cost me. Snails who comes here? mistress Ferries, or mistress what call you her? Put up John Hobs, money tempts beauty. Do you demand whats dear? marry corn and cow hides, Mass a good sni g lass, well Like my daughter Nell, I had rather then a bend of leather she and I might smutch to gither. Yes mistress that I did. By my hood you make me laugh, what the dickens is it love that makes you prate to me so fondly, by my father's soul I would I had iobd faces with you. Much Queen I trow, these be but women, and one of them is Like my wench, I would she had her rags, I would give a load of hair and horns, and a fat of leather, to match her to some justice, by the meghollie. And you be the Queen, I cry you mercy good mistress Queen. God send yée-good standing, and good striking, and fat flesh, see if all Gentle women be not alike when their black facce be on, I took the Queen, as I am true Tanner, for mistress Ferris. Soft, who comes here, more knaves yet? No good fellow, I saw no King, which King dost thou ask for. No, good fellows be thieves. Then thou knowest no body: didst never hear of John Hobs the Tanner of am worth? So do not I thee, I fear thou art some out-rider, that lives by taking of purses here on Base S heath, but I fear Thee n to, for I have wared all my money in Cowhides, at Colesill market, and my man & my mare are hard by at the hill foot. Thats Brock my mare, and theres Dun my nag, and Dadgeon my man. That will I see afore isle take your word. Faith ti's pity that one subica should have in his hand that might do good to many through the land. Come Nell, come daughter, is your hands and your face washed? Gods blessing on thee, that half years schooling at Liechfield, was better to thee then house and land, it has put such manners into thee, I forsooth and no forsooth at every word, ye have a clean smock on. I Like your apparel well, is supper ready? Have we a good barley bagpudding, a piece of fat Bacon, a good cow heel, a hard cheese, and a brown loaf. Now the dtuell choke them, so they have eat me a farthing candle the other night. How now knave, what fairest thou Dudgeon? What guests be they? Ned the kings butcher? would, would, the kings butler, take their horses, and walk them, and bid them come near house, Nell lay the cloth, and clap supper oath b rd. Mass heres Ned indeed and another misproud uffian, Welcome Ned, I Like thy honesty, thou keepest promise. By my troth you are both welcome to Tamwoorth: friend I know not your name. Believe you that list: but you are welcome both, and I Like you both well but for one thing. Nay that I keep to my self, for I sighs to see and think, that pride brings many one to er ion. Troth I doubt you never came truly by all these gay rags. 'Tis not your bore wages and thin f S ye have of the King, can keep you thus fine, but either ye must rob the King privily, or his subjects openly, to maintain your probicallitie. 'Tis no matter what I think, come lets go to supper, What Nell, what Dudgeon, where be these folks? Daughter bid my friends welcome. How likest her Ned? And I Like Thee so well Ned, that hadst thou and occu pation, for service is no heritage, a young courtier, and old beggar, I could sinde in my heart to cast her away upon Thee, and if thou wilt forsake the court and turn La ner, or vind thy self to a shoemaker in Liechfield, le give thee twenty nobles ready money, with my Nell, and trust Thee with a dic ker of leather, to set up thy trade. What then? I have herd of courtiers have said as much as you, and when they have been tried, would not bid their friends rink. So the fecke and meaning, whereby as it were of all your long purgation Sir Humphrey is no more in some respect, but the king wants money & would have some of his Comentie. Ah Ned, I was brought hither with a whirlwind man, my son, my son, did I not tell thee I had a knave to my son? Wilt thou Ned? for those good words, see what my Daughter Nell hath sent thee, a handkerchief wrought with as good Coventry silk blue thread as ever thou sawest. How Ned, a better present? that canst thou not have for silk, cloth, and workmanship, why Nell made it man. But Ned? is not the King in this company, wshat he in the long beard and the red petticoat? before God I misooubt Ned that is the King, I know it by my Lord what you calls players. What Nicnames these courtnoles have? Mare and Corder quotha? we have no such at Liechfield, there is the ho nest Bailiff and his brothers, such words agree best with us. I thank ye good goodman Masor, but I care not for no meat, my stomach is Like to a sick swines, that will neither eat nor drink, till she know what shall become of her pig. Ned and Tom, you promised me a good turn when I came to Court, either do it now, or go hang your selves. Nay, I fear not his life, I fear his death. Out alas that ever I was born. Bite ginger, bite ginger, bite a dogs date, I am but a dead man, ah my Liege, that you should deal so with a poor well meaniug man, but it makes no matter, I can but die. Nay even when you please, for I have so defended you, by calling you plain Ned, mad rogue and rascal, that I know yowl have me hanged. Theref re make no more a do, but send me down to Stafford, and there a Gods name hang me with my son. And heres another as honest as your self, you made me call him plain Tom, I warrant his name is Thomas, and some man of worship too, therefore lets to it, even when and where you will. Marry you speak Like and honest man, if you mean as you say. Snails, twenty pound a kiss? had she as many twenty pound bags as I have knobs of bark in my tansat she might kiss them away in a quarter of a year. e no Saint Katherine's widows, if kisses be so deer. Why no, for I am ust a kin to Sutton Windmill, I can grind which way so ere the wind blow, if it be Harry I can say well fare Lancaster, if it be Edward I can sing, York, York for my monse. Nay there thou liest, he has wit enough, and courage enough, do thou not speak treason? I would nothing to do at Court, isle home with my cowhids, and if the King will come to me he shall be welcome. By the Mass and the Mattens I Like not those Pat tents, sirrah they that have them, do as the Priests did in old ne, buy and fell the sins of the people, so they make the King belée they mend whats amiss, and for money they make the thing worse then it is, theres another thing in , the mor is the pity? Lot me no lotting, isle not go with thee, if thou wilt go with me, cause thart my Lciges man (and yet I think be has many honester) thou shalt be welcome to John Hobs, thou shalt be welcome to ease and bacon, and perhaps a bag pudding, and my daughter Nell shall pop a possell upon thee when thou ghost to bed. Dost thou hear me Ned? if I shall be thy host, Make haste thou art best, for fear thou kiss the ost. Thats light news & merry for your master king Edward. Now good sir Humphrey Bows, and M. As , Have you declared y kings most gracious pleasure? My heart? God bless me from seeing my heart. Courser callest thou him? so ill might I fare, thy skittish jade will never abide, to carry my leather, my horns nor hide. But if I were so mad to scorse, what boot wouldst thou give nice? 'Tis well sir Humphrey. Thanks M. Aston, you both show your love, Now as c your neighbours what they will bestow? Out grudging peasant, base ill nurturd groom, Is that the love thou bearest unto the King? Gentlemen take notice of the slave, And if he fault let him be soundly plagued? Now frolic Janner, what wilt thou afford?